Iโm back for a better one โwhatโs cookinโ good lookinโ , I smell bacon from whatcha shakinโ โ
Send a funny pick-up line!
-
@James-C-137 what's better than a baby in a trash bag? 40 babies in a trash bag.
-
@mikeJB Ima take guess and say ur were the bully in school๐๐
I didn't read the top i just saw make a dark joke so i did haha ๐๐ -
@XxBabyBooxX samir is I'd is Sam770
-
@XxBabyBooxX what good about 21 year old's
THERES TWENTY OF EM ๐๐๐๐
-
@mikeJB savage XD
-
that dress looks good on you but itd look alot better on my floor
-
Is your name winter? Because youโll be coming soon.
-
I couldโve called heaven and asked for an angel, but I was hoping youโre a slut instead.
-
Can you do telekinesis? Because youโve made a part of me move without even touching it.
-
One of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you wanna help me prove him wrong?
-
-
Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore โ my face should be among them.
-
Do you like to draw? Because I put the D in Raw.
-
Want to see if you can add โhas an awesome gag reflexโ to your resume?
-
Do you want to commit a sin for your next confessional?
-
The FBI wants to steal my penis. Can I hide it inside you?
-
Iโm not into watching sunsets, but Iโd love to see you go down.
-
Do you have any Italian in you? Would you like some?
-
I donโt think I want your babies, but I wouldnโt mind refining my baby making technique with you.
-
-
Letโs play carpenter. First weโll get hammered, then Iโll nail you.
-
Your smile is almost as big, warm, and lovely as my penis.
-
If itโs true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
-
Are you a raisin? Because youโre raisin my dick.
-
Iโd love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. And the ones on your face.
-
Iโm a bird watcher and Iโm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher. Have you seen one?
-
Do you run track? Because I heard you Relay want this dick.
-
Tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes.
-
Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit.
-
Are you a pirate? Because I have a lot of semen waiting for you.
-
Was your dad a baker? Because youโve got a nice set of buns.
-
Are you a shark? Because Iโve got some swimmers for you to swallow.
-
I lost my keysโฆ Can I check your pants?
-
Are you a doctor? Because you just cured my erectile dysfunction.
-
Do you like whales? Because we can go hump back at my place.
-
Do you believe in karma? Because I know some good karma-sutra positions.
-
When I saw you, I lost my tongue. Can I put yours in my mouth?
-
Do you have a shovel? Because Iโm digging that ass.
-
I hope you like dragons, because Iโll be dragon my balls across your face tonight.
-
Are you an archaeologist? Because Iโve got a bone for y
-
-
Did you just come out of the oven? Because youโre hot.
-
Do you work at Home Depot? Because youโre giving me wood.
-
Is that a keg in your pants? Because Iโd love to tap that ass.
-
Are you my new boss? Because you just gave me a raise.
-
You are so selfish. Youโre going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night.
-
Hi, Iโm wasted but this condom in my pocket doesnโt have to be.
-
Let me insert my plug into your socket and we can generate some electricity.
-
If Iโm a pain in your assโฆ We can just add more lubricant.
-
Do you know your ABCโs? Cause I wanna give you the 4th letter of the alphabet.
-
What has four legs and doesnโt have the most beautiful girl on it? My bed. Want to fix that?
-
Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie. I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle.
-
I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?
-
Are you a cowgirl? Because I can see you riding me.
-
Are you the lottery lady on TV? Because Iโm picturing you holding up my balls.
-
Do you mix concrete for a living? Because youโre making me hard.
-
Iโm gonna have sex with you tonight so you might as well be there.
-
Are you a farmer? Because youโve got some big, round, beautiful melons.
-
-
Fuck me if Iโm wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right?
-
Thatโs a beautiful smile, but itโd look even better if it was all you were wearing.
-
Are you a racehorse? Because when I ride youโll always finish first.
-
Did you grow up on a chicken farm? Because you sure know how to raise a cock.
-
Roses or daises? Now I know what flowers to put on your casket when I murder that pussy.
-
Are you a tortilla? Because I want to flip you over and eat you out.
-
You can call me cake, because Iโll go straight to your ass.
-
-
What is a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
-
Are you flappy bird? Because I could tap you all night.
-
Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
-
Call me leaves, because you should be blowing me.
-
I just popped a Viagra. So weโve got about 30 minutes to get back to your place.
-
Hey, you wanna do a 68? You go down on me, and Iโll owe you one.
-
You know what I like in a girl? My dick.
-
Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under.
-
Are you a trampoline? Because I want to bounce on you.
-
As long as I have a face, youโll have a place to sit.
-
I may not go down in history, but Iโll go down on you.
-
Remember my name, because youโll be screaming it later.
-
Why pay for a bra when I would gladly hold your boobs up all day for free?
-
Pizza is my second favorite thing to eat in bed.
-
You should sell hotdogs, because you already know how to make a wiener stand.
-
The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor.
-
There will only be 7 planets left after I destroy Uranus.
-
Your place or mine? Tell you what? Iโll flip a coin. Head at my place, tail at yours.
-
Do you work at Subway? Because you just gave me a footlong.
-
I spent over a grand on Viagra today, only to come here and see you and find out that I donโt need it after all.
-
Are you hungry? Because omelette you suck this dick.
-
-
If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
-
You must be Medusa because you make me rock hard.
-
Do you go to church often? Because youโre gonna be on your knees tonight.
-
My dickโs been feeling a little dead lately. Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth?
-
Is your name Dora? Because Iโll let you explore this dick.
-
I would tell you a joke about my penis, but itโs too long.
-
If I was a watermelon, would you spit or swallow my seed?
-
Are your legs made of Nutella? Because Iโd love to spread them.
-
Let us let only latex stand between our love.
-
Are you a sea lion? Because I can sea you lion in my bed tonight.
-
-
have a big headache. I hear the best cure for headaches is sex. What do you say we go upstairs and work out a remedy?
-
I may not be a windshield repairman, but I can still fill your crack in.
-
That dress looks great on youโฆ as a matter of fact, so would I.
-
Iโm like Dominoโs Pizza. If I donโt come in 30 minutes, the next one is free.
-
There are plenty of fish in the sea, but youโre the only one Iโd like to catch and mount back at my place.
-
Whatโs the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I donโt have a Ferrari.
-
Why donโt you surprise your roommate and not come home tonight?
-
Iโd like to use your thighs as earmuffs.
-
This may seem corny, but you make me really horny.
-
Do you have pet insurance? Because your pussyโs getting smashed tonight.
-
-
If I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head?
-
Iโm a freelance gynecologist. How long has it been since your last checkup?
-
My dick just died. Would you mind if I buried it in your ass?
-
Are you my homework? Cause Iโm not doing you but I definitely should be.
-
Excuse me, I am about to go masturbate and needed a name to go with the face.
-
Are those jeans Guess? Because guess who wants to be inside themโฆ
-
Iโm no weather man, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.
-
Donโt ever change. Just get naked.
-
Iโm an astronaut and my next mission is to explore Uranus.
-
Let me guess your favorite position: anything that involves my balls bouncing against your ass.
-
Girl are you an iceberg? Because youโre making me want to go down.
-
I can see into the future, and yeah, weโre gonna fuck at least once.
-
Can you tell me what time your legs open, please?
-
Smile if you want to have sex with me.
-
My couch pulls out but I donโt.
-
Are you butt dialing? Because I swear that ass is calling me.
-
Do you like cherries? If not, can I have yours?
-
I wish you were soap so I could feel you all over me.
-
If you were an elevator, what button would I have to push to get you to go down?
-
Youโre so hot even my zipper is falling for you.
-
I want to wear you like a pair of sunglassesโฆ One leg over each ear.
-
Letโs play house. You can be the door then I can slam you all I want.
-
You know how your hair would look really good? In my lap.
-
Iโll show you my tan lines if youโll show me yours.
-
If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
-
You know, if I were you, Iโd have sex with me.
-
We should play strip poker. You can strip and Iโll poke you.
-
Iโm scared of getting pregnant, so do you want to go up to my room and help me test all my condoms?
-
Iโll kiss you in the rain so you get twice as wet.
-
My magical watch says youโre not wearing any panties? Oh you are? Darn, it must be an hour fast.
-
I hope youโre a plumber, because youโve got my pipe leaking.
-
Letโs play Barbie. Iโll be Ken and you can be the box I come in.
-
Liquor is not the only hard thing around here.
-
What time do you get off? Can I watch?
-
So youโre not into casual sex? Fine, Iโll put on a tux and we can call it formal sex.
-
Excuse me, but does my tongue taste funny to you?
-
Youโre on my list of things to do tonight.
-
I want you to be the girl who takes my virginity.
-
What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper.
-
Your clothes are making me uncomfortable; please take them off.
-
Are you related to Dracula? Because you looked a little thirsty when you were looking at me.
-
Great dress. Iโm sorry Iโll have to rip it apart.
-
I bet your nipples are pink. Mind if I take a look?
-
Bet I can touch your belly buttonโฆ from the inside.
-
Want to save water by showering together?
-
Iโm an adventurer and I want to explore your cave.
-
Letโs play a game. The fastest person to take their clothes off wins.
-
If I was your teacher Iโd give you the D.
-
How do you like your eggs: poached, scrambled, or fertilized?
-
Treat me like a pirate and give me that booty.
-
I may not have gotten your virginity, but can I at least have the box it came in?
-
Sit on my face and Iโll eat my way to your heart.
-
Iโm a mindreader and yes I will sleep with you.
-
I like my coffee how I like my womanโฆ creamed.
-
How about you get on your knees and smile like a donut.
-
I wanna put my thingy into your thingy.
-
You look so good, I wanna kiss your lips and move up to your bellybutton.
-
Letโs go to my place and do the things Iโll tell everyone we did anyway.
-
Would it be weird if I wanted to bang your brains out, or just that I didnโt call you after?
-
Want to go halves on a baby?
-
Iโm like a Rubikโs Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get.
-
I know a great way to burn off the calories in that drink.
-
Am I on an episode of Fixer Upper? Because Iโve never seen hardwood like that in real life.
-
My doctor told me I have a Vitamin D deficiency. Wanna go back to my place and save me?
-
Are you a supermarket sample? Because I wanna taste you again and again without any sense of shame.
-
They say that kissing is a language of love, so would you mind starting a conversation with me?
-
Iโm just like a pore strip. Hard to get off, but extremely satisfied once you do.
-
Youโre just like a wine tasting. They say to spit, but I always prefer swallowing.
-
I was feeling off today, but you definitely turned me on.
-
Want a job? It blows.
-
Hi, Iโm a burglarโฆ and Iโm going to smash your back door in.
-
Iโm a zombie, can I eat you out?
-
Iโm a businessman. I work in orifices, got any openings?
-
Some men go around telling women they have an eight-inch penis, but Iโd never shortchange myself like that.
-
Your ass is pretty tight, want me to loosen it up?
-
I think my allergies are acting up. Because every time your around my dick swells up.
-
Iโve just received government funding for a four-hour expedition to find your G-spot.
-
Iโm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock.
-
Lie down on that couch and pretend your legs hate each other.
-
Do you know the difference between my penis and a chicken wing? No? Well, letโs go on a picnic and find out.
-
Letโs go to my place and do some math. Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.
-
Youโre like my pinky toe, Iโm gonna bang you on every piece of furniture in my home.
-
Do you know why they call me the cat whisperer? Because I know exactly what your pussy needs.
-
Your face is like a wrench, every time I look at it my balls tighten up.
-
Iโll be Burger King and you be McDonaldโs. Iโll have it my way and youโll be lovinโ it.
-
Are you a sprinkler? Because youโre making me wet.
-
-
@S-A-M-I She know My account we used to talk in personal Message!
-
Is ur dad a fighter ?? ..cause ur a knock out .๐๐๐
-
If I said you were beautiful, would you take your pants off and dance a little?