all the love ๐ค stay strong
Should I leave my husband who doesn't want to get a job?
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We have been together 13 years, married 2. We met when we were teenagers I've had jobs the whole time. I now have a successful career in healthcare.
He has never had a job. Ever. We've done things 50/50 because he had inheritance. It's running out and he doesn't have a job. He says he's looking and trying but he's never had a job in 13 years. I don't know if I can carry on like this. Everything else in our relationship is good.What do I do?
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@Lovelost according to me it shouldn't be enough to leave him if he is really trying to have a job and like cutting his expences and is really worried.
I think my advice wiil help you out and will make your relationship better -
@Rohitag I don't think he is trying. I'm worried he's lying to me about applying for jobs. He hid from me how little the amount of savings he has left...
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@Lovelost is he worried about not having a job? Or doing something like stock market, bank FD ?
Or is having something else in mind about future? -
@Rohitag not worried enough to get any kind of job/apprenticeship/work experience of any sort. Or any kind of help or support...
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@Rohitag he has done some stock market but it's not successful enough to make any real returns
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@Rohitag he was doing part time study by he's given up on that
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@Lovelost If you dosen't mind can you tell me do you have any kids
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@Rohitag no kids. Neither of us want them. One of the things that makes us compatible.
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@Lovelost okay has he mentioned something about his struggles in finding job by himself(recently like in a month or 2) or is stressed nowadays
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@Rohitag we've had a couple deep discussions about his struggle to find a job. I think we've made progress but then nothing. He complains about my help trying to find suitable jobs and he doesn't update me on anything he's doing. He hasn't been for any interviews
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@Lovelost so no problem just talk politely to him and give him timelimit like 2 or 3 months to find a job by himself and if he fails than say that he has to do work where you got him a job
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@Rohitag I gave him a time limit, it's come and gone. I'm not sure what you mean by get him a job, I can't get one for him?
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@Lovelost oh i got it and you don't worry it's hard but love has power to cure it all. Just be patient and it will be good for everyone at end.Everyone's hardwork always pay off one day or the other.
Do whatever you can and than god will handle everything -
@Lovelost I can help you figure out your problems I am a almost retired therapist so I can with expertise couples so if you want my help too figure things out I mean I have high expertise on a weight scale not only couples. Dm me if you want my help because maybe thereโs more then just him who doesnโt want too work
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@Heilmaus thank you. But he won't agree to therapy... He needs help but he won't get it. If you have any tips about how I can talk to him to get him to listen and understand the situation?
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@Lovelost He might be trying for job, give him your support. If he treats you badly then is the right time to leave him. You better know ,if love is between you both are not. Don't ask anyone's opinion. It is you who have to make your life's choices.
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@hardik5369 if he is then why doesn't he share it with me? I don't think he is
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@hardik5369 he doesn't treat me badly. I love him. But I need people who aren't in out relationship to give me an objective idea of if I should stay with a man who had never had a job when I have ever since we've dated... And shows no signs of ever getting a job or getting help...
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@Lovelost If he is trying, give him time... If youre really in financial urgency then he should take any job he can get, as long as he makes clean money...
If not on an immediate need, give him time to continue trying to find a job he likes...I dont think it should really be a reason to leave him right away...
if he is, in the other hand, lying to you about being trying to get a job... ehhh confront him about it and about your future.
You knew since the start he never worked jajajajaja... my question is: arent you willing to err being the only one providing? XD not telling you to! just asking... if you arent willing and he is not making any effort, I guess you know the conclusion.
