I’m struggling , kind words needed


  • I’m reaching the end of my rope, I wager. I had a fiancé, we were together for 8 years. I spent the majority of my 20s supporting her while she got her degree, then through her anxiety, self harm, fights with family etc. I put all my energy into it.
    Finally, we moved to her dream town, and her career got off the ground. The moment she was living in her dream flat, and working her dream job, she lost interest in me entirely. After a couple of months, she said that she had lost her feelings towards me and that she was breaking our engagement.

    I was relegated to sleeping in the office until I could afford to rent a place for myself.

    I now have moved out and have been for a few weeks, it’s been a few months since the breakup happened and I am living alone for the first time in 8 years, sleeping alone, coming home from work to an empty flat, I’m now 31 and feel like I have less focus on my life than I ever have before. I don’t know anyone in the area, and I have made the effort to go out and make friends locally, I have even been on a few dates. My job is going well, I am able to pull it together enough to perform well and as far as anyone at work is concerned I am my normal cheerful self. While I have been successful in a few aspects of my life since the breakup, it all feels so hollow.
    I feel used and tossed aside.
    I made an account on here in the hope that someone might understand, or resonate with what I’m saying. Maybe some kind words, something.

    If I don’t reply straight away I’m most likely at work.


  • Ey bossman, life goes on you can't control it!

    Find someone else and move on, things happen for a reason, might be difficult at first but it goes away with time, don't waste your life re-living the past. You need to make room for the future and yourself, put yourself first and under as little pressure as possible, life gets better we all go through tough times trust me! If she left you then she isn't meant for you, you will heal with time and meet someone better that's gonna stay with you for life!

    Love you man hope you're doing well <3 !


  • Try pranic healing and twin hearts meditation pls


  • Hey, Ahhmm honestly speaking.. I don't really have the best advice to give. But the moment I saw the word "struggling" I just kinda click on it. Never been in a relationship so never know what advice to give to you but been struggling in life so.. The only thing I could say I guess is that. Whatever your feeling right now, it's all valid. It's ok to cry, to feel the pain it cause you. But the moment you stop crying, pick up yourself. Do not give someone the satisfaction of seeing you like that. To continue to live the life you were used to might be difficult at the moment, but hold on to the important things or people that you still have. For every storm will pass by. Your life will get back to the way it used to be. Not now but hold on and someday it will...

  • Global Veteran

    If you haven't yet sent her to Jupiter please forgive yourself for letting her hurt you and forgive her for hurting you.


  • You got used and manipulated . The only thing you can do is forget her this process takes time ... go do your hobbies and start praying . Don't go to another relationship the next 2-3 years it's healing time .


  • @AProblem In simple words, she manipulated you and used you. But I guess that's the harsh truth you have to live with. Please try to get used to it as fast as you can. The more you actually think about it, the worse it will make you feel. So just have that "Fuck it" attitude and let her live her own life. God knows what you did for her. She'll get karma for her actions; it's inevitable. Don't worry. I would personally suggest you try the spiritual way. Maybe visit a nearby church, mosque, temple, or anything you wish? Personally, when I feel low, I cook. I don't know why, but it helps me in mysterious ways :)), Wish you luck!!