Could do with some advice (a first for the man that normally gives advice :/ )

[DayShifter]

@kali-linux said in Could do with some advice (a first for the man that normally gives advice ):

@shaun-durwin ok what's your addiction first off?

At this point in time I would like to keep it as a generic addiction. My addiction is 100% legal and does not include any form of drug either naturally produced by the earth we inhabit or by companies that mankind have developed.
(Sorry to be cryptic, but Generic Help is the Best required for this time)

[Kali Linux]

@shaun-durwin completely understand anytime we deal with facing a character defect in ourselfs especially something that we are addicted to we tend to be very self concious about it trust me I'm a recovering addict to more than one vice some legal most not but with that being said I won't push and just so you know I'm here to talk with you about whatever I'm not a therapist nor do I have any valid license to make any sort of diagnosis on you I have however spent many years reading literature about addictions behaviors and different types of personalities and what they tend to fall victims to most commonly so I will listen and I will tell my story and I will give you my honest opinion on how I myself go about dealing with my struggles and I will never judge nor tell you your different from any other addict on this earth but if I recommend you talking with a true professional because I believe you'd benefit from it because there may be things they can do to help you cope or have reduced urges with your addiction would you do it?

[DayShifter]

@kali-linux said in Could do with some advice (a first for the man that normally gives advice ):

@shaun-durwin completely understand anytime we deal with facing a character defect in ourselfs especially something that we are addicted to we tend to be very self concious about it trust me I'm a recovering addict to more than one vice some legal most not but with that being said I won't push and just so you know I'm here to talk with you about whatever I'm not a therapist nor do I have any valid license to make any sort of diagnosis on you I have however spent many years reading literature about addictions behaviors and different types of personalities and what they tend to fall victims to most commonly so I will listen and I will tell my story and I will give you my honest opinion on how I myself go about dealing with my struggles and I will never judge nor tell you your different from any other addict on this earth but if I recommend you talking with a true professional because I believe you'd benefit from it because there may be things they can do to help you cope or have reduced urges with your addiction would you do it?

Thank you sir for your reply. I to have gone through both legal and illicit addictions, and at the rip old age of 42 thought I had gotten to a place where I was 100% happy (despite the pain I have caused) with where I and my life have got to.
I have recently lost my councilor, due to issues with her place of work. This does not make it easy.
My current predicament / addiction makes me feel like I am a young man again. This is not necessarily a bad thing, except for what it is doing to my head, to my thinking.
If it's ok I may message in the near future to talk about what is going on in more detail.
Shit, life aint supposed to be this way at my age. lol

[Kali Linux]

@shaun-durwin feel free to message at anytime and I do appreciate the Sir but I myself am only 32, sir lol

[spaceboy]

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[spaceboy]

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[ObviouslyLucifer]

Just like @spaceboy said, replace it with other constructive addiction.

Another thing you can do is:

Plan a complete schedule for how will you spend your day, go somewhere with friends, do a hobby, do something to distract you from your addiction.
It could be do some form of workout or even meditation can help a lot.

And plan not just for the day but if possible set a timeline and set a significant day on which you want yourself to be free of addiction.
Like your loved ones birthday or the day Britain leaves EU!!
Having a deadline will improve your chances of quitting.

Remember how companies have that board

Make one for yourself!
It will keep you motivated and give your brain a rewarding feeling with the increasing number!
It may also instill a certain fear but hey whatever gets the job done!

Another thing you can do is:

Identify the things that remind you of your addiction and think about the consequences rather than the pleasures.

And lastly...
Don't stop fighting for yourself.
This process in your life will be tough, but at the end you'll feel an entirely different version of yourself, the version that you worked hard for.

[DayShifter]

@spaceboy Thank you for the suggestions here Sir. They are duly noted an in prep

[DayShifter]

@obviouslylucifer Thanks for the response Sir. Constructive and helpful as always.
I think my addiction is more of an infatuation than definitive addiction. As I said to @kali-linux
My current predicament / addiction makes me feel like I am a young man again. This is not necessarily a bad thing, except for what it is doing to my head, to my thinking.
But you are right, to adjust my days structure and to find something else to preoccupy myself with. Bizarrely I started doing an embroidery piece yesterday. Maybe this will help

[Magnusen]

@shaun-durwin All addictive behaviors have at least these two things in common: (1) they help people cut off painful feelings and (2) they are strongly influenced or controlled by a destructive thought process that both seduces the person into the behavior and punishes them for indulging. People who engage in drug or alcohol abuse, who have an eating disorder, or who struggle with any addiction are acting according to the prescriptions of a destructive thought process known as the critical inner voice. For example, if you struggle with an alcohol dependency, this internal enemy will try to tempt you with a seductive, seeming friendly thought (or “voice”) saying, “You’ve had a rough week. Have a drink. You really need to relax.” If you’re overcoming a food addiction, it might lure you with rewards, “Have a piece of cake. You did well on your diet all week.” After indulging, this deceptively soothing inner voice transforms into a cruel enemy, tearing you apart. The voice maliciously punishes you for indulging in the very behavior it had encouraged. “You weak-willed jerk. You said you weren’t going to drink anymore!” “You’ve ruined everything. You’ll always be a fat cow.” Identify the critical inner voices that govern these habit patterns and to challenge their dictates by learning more constructive ways of dealing with emotional pain. Most people succeed when they recognize that the addiction interferes with something they value—and when they develop the confidence that they can change.