• I'm afraid I have missed my chance at being hers. If only I had confessed my true feelings long ago, maybe she'd still be in my life. But recently, I shared something personal with her. A song I had written a long time ago, but then one night completely changed almost all the lyrics. Within the lyrics of my song, I was confessing all my feelings to her. A few days went by and we met up one night to hang out. We did that often, either getting together late at night or early in the morning to watch the sunrise. Since that one night, about 2 weeks ago, Iv'e heard nothing from her. I wasn't asking her for a relationship or for her to confess any feelings she had towards me. I just had to let her know what was on my mind. I was holding it in for a long time and for me, the greatest way to share what's inside is writing a song, singing those words, and strumming my guitar. My music is my get-away. It is my own dimension where time doesn't exist. Only what I'm thinking in that moment. I get lost when I sing and play guitar. Anyways... I just feel like she might of found someone else or she was too thrown off by hearing those words "I'm in love with you.". I honestly feel like I scared her away. One minute we were communicating. Then one day, it stopped. Iv'e sent her messages but she has not replied to any. I sent one final message and apologized and told her I would back off and that if she ever wanted to see me, I would still be here. But it feels like ill never see her again. I still want her in my life someway. But, if she chooses never to speak to me again, I have to live with it...don't i? But i just can't move on yet. I don't want to. We shared something so special. I was excited to see her every time we hung out. But i think I blew it for good. Now, all i feel is this sinking emptiness inside. Days will go by where I feel absolutely no emotion towards anything or anyone. It's like a part of my brain has been shut down so that I don't "feel" anymore. I'm numb. I have breakdowns at least once a week where all my pain just comes to my realization and I end up crying on and off for hours alone while drinking from a bottle of Captain Morgan. I think my heart is breaking. It feels like part of me has died inside. I'm not so sure I'll ever be the same again. Because all i can think about is that, regardless of my love for her, Iv'e lost her completely. I don't know if I'll ever be able to truly move on. I'm in love... and it hurts so much.

  • @jay94 look man....even if you didn't have her...she left you...your heart is fucked up...probably this is one of the best things in your life...now you know the outcome...she left get over it....you must move on and do what's best for you because if you don't life wont wait for you...she wait's no one...you should move and figure out what's your next move....meet a girl...go to the gym....work or study...just make sure you don't have the time for thinking about her and you'll be fine in a period of time.

  • @jay94
    Damn. Reading this hit the feelings. Honestly it was the better choice for you to tell her. Especially if you have been feeling for her already. It's only those "What if" moments because here you are liking someone and not knowing how they feel. Wondering what should you tell her and if you should. At the same you gotta loom out for yourself.. its better to know than to never know, it was a risk you took. I can only imagine what you are feeling having opened up your heart and writing a song for her and she not responding. It can mean a number of things.. but in my honest opinion, I think you shouldn't give up just yet. Give your all so at least in the end you'll know you did and how much it meant to you. Losing someone special hurts but it hurts more to have feeling kept inside. I would also try to talk to her once in person. See why she did what she did and how she feels.. it's better for you to know it all then to wonder later on. Hope this helps or give you some insight and thanks for writing on my post vent.