Best posts made by Indrid Cold

@HowardPotts33 The dad looks like he's using a goose's head as a whip, and the mum looks like she's got a dress made from cancer cells, so I'll probably give the credits back because I fear them, but in the meantime I'll be looking for more intel to find out what's gong on #GooseWhipManistheNewThanos

Lots of people are grumpy about religion nowdays, and the last thing I wanna do is stir up a bitter and unwinnable debate on a site as chill as TWS. But there's no denying that Sunday is -or was- mainly a religious thing.

Can you hear the church bells from where you are? Do they wind you up, or do you like them?

Do you ever go INSIDE your local church? What kinda stain glass windows u got? I like it because looking at them is like a free trip ...if you're too scared to take acid.

What would you use your local church for if it wasn't a church?

Do you think you could peruade your vicar to ring the bells if Man City win the league today? Or, alternatively, play a slow funeral dirge if the Bindippers win? (I'm joking, I like Man City and Liverpool, so it's win-win in my book -- although I DO got £17 riding on Pep's Boyz).

Hey, maybe we could turn some of those disused churches into betting shops?

https://images.app.goo.gl/T1yjS3BRGd9vL54X7

Hello Everyone,
I'm Jane Seymour. It's a pleasure to come here today, on behalf of my good friend Indrid Cold, to open this exciting new venture, the TWS 'Mad Thoughts' page.

All too often, mad thoughts go unacknowledged and unappreciated. When I was filming 'Live and Let Die' with the late, great Sir Roger Moore, he was very much preoccupied with the idea that the speedboat in which he raced was actually stationary, and what was happening was that the water and world around him was being rotated at high speed by forces unknown. Of course, absolute professional that he was, no one could have guessed what was going on his mind, as he was, as ever, 'Shaken not stirred'!

And so I invite you all to contribute your mad thoughts here. It can be any small thing from your day-to-day life - in fact, some might say, the smaller the better! Or you could just try to dazzle us all with something truly mad.
Some examples of mad thoughts from my own life.

• What if birds get speeding fines if they fly too fast, and a magpie just appears from behind a tree and demands they pay an on-the-spot penalty of three worms?

• What if the horizon is just a one-dimensional 'trompe L'oeil' propped up by gigantic cardboard struts, and if there was a sufficiently strong wind, the whole thing would just blow over?

• I see an old lady waiting for the bus, the same time every morning. But what if, one morning, instead of stepping on to the bus, she just 'merged' with it like the T-1000 liquid Terminator?

Thank you all very much! Thank you!

What's the bleakest shop you've ever been in? Like a shop, and you go in there, but you're not sure if you're having a bad dream or not?

TELL ME.

But I think you'll have to go a ways to beat mine. I has travelling around Wales last month, and I heard that Toni Collette and Damian Lewis were filming a movie in the next little town along the valley, so I LEGGED IT over there with the intention of getting selfies.

Got there, and --Blaenavon is indeed a bleak-looking little town. NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT: hell, I live near Swindon and I bludy love that place. Having a dour, industrial town doesn't necessarily mean the people and the shops will be bleak or dour. However, as I loitered among the catering wagons, and the milling extras, and the fussy 'second unit' directors ...I realised I had to do something to fill my time until the sheila and the ginger turned up.

I looked around the industrial museum (REMEMBER INDUSTRY, DO YOU, BRITAIN? I-I-I THINK IT WAS LIKE BETAMAX TAPES OR SOMETHING), I looked along the high street. A supermarket that had wire baskets outside selling ex-rental DVDs. A charity shop that sold mainly incongruous women's fashions and DVDs that had been given away free with magazines.

But I thought my boredom was OVER when I saw a secondhand BOOKSHOP. How can you go wrong with a bookshop? Inside, the densely-packed shelves were spaced just widely enough to allow 'elbow' room, but not much more. And there was a barking 'husky' dog --but he wasn't really ferocious; that was just his style, and I loved him.

Here's the problem: I walked in, and one of the old women was like, "Do you want a cup of tea? All books are £1. We don't get many visitors". Now, being needy, and over-familiar -- that's fine. That's part of the human condition. What drove me a little bit mad was that I was DESPERATE to buy a book, but all the books were RUBBISH. 95% hack thrillers, 5% biographies of personality-vacuums like Gloria Hunniford and Ian Botham. The closest thing I could possibly think of buying was a door-stop 600-pager about Sufism, but bearing in mind that literally all I had with me on holiday was a tiny ruc-sac ...how was I meant to carry this thing around? And so I just ducked out of the place.

In retrospect, the moral thing would've been to buy £5 worth of books at random, then just dump them somewhere. But I can't think of everything. I'm only human. The only thing that made the whole thing bearable was the thought that, later on, I'd be able to use it as anecdote-ammunition in some kind of social media post.

And I never did get to see Damian Lewis or Toni Colette.

Nightmare.

@spacegirl I like that positivity. And the dinosaurs might be gone, but has there ever been a cooler creature since? Maybe the dingo that stole Meryl Streep's baby and got away with it.

@spacegirl said in Will everything be alright in the end?:

But on the other side, switching from changeable to stable state - is a change itself

Maybe Jesus getting born in the stable was a kinda metaphor for how he was bringing in a stable state for all mankind?

Always unnerving when a reliable, familiar name disappears. I demand that you recruit at least a dozen new punters to take yr place.

But good work making Bernard Cribbins cry for that photo.

If you had a magic rickshaw that could travel through time, which celebrity would you choose to pedal it? Eh?

Me, I would choose BBC political editor Laura Kuenssberg, with the reasoning that: 1) Her journalistic curiosity and ambition would make her duty-bound to WILLINGLY do it. 2) I quite like her, but not to the point where I'd feel bad if our adventures ran into trouble and I had to abandon her.

Yous?

Ramen seems like a very high-concept meal to have for brekkies. 復venは最高の風邪をひいた料理

I just sucked on a pebble like a hobo.

@belethor You could always speed it up by quickly making a robot wife and child - say, from a shop mannikin with an 'Alexa' taped to its head, and a shaved Teddy Ruxpin?

• Baby Jesus

• Virgin Mary

• Donkey

• Chicken

• Baby Jesus 2

• Joseph

• Wise Man

• Roman Guard

• Time Cop

• Angel

• God

• Histor the Crow

• Inn Keeper

• Big Chungus

• Other

• Other other.

@kaia_ You ever notice Tom from Tom & Jerry, his pupils were diluted 24-7. High as a kite. Probably dead or in prison now.

OMG u guyz pls help ! :slot_machine: :violin: :angry_face_with_horns: :angry_face_with_horns: :astonished_face:

So, I do a lot of reading. I wake up in the night, due to the angst, and the existential terror? I read a book. Hence I get through a lot of books.

In England, we have an arrangement, where you can take your finished books to your local public phonebox, where you'll find shelves and shelves of books, and just swap them for some new ones. The question I need resolved is this:

If I take in a book, does that give me the right, -- if I want -- to take one of the books that I HATE and just throw it away instead of reading it?

Just to stress, I wouldnt be throwing away rubbish books. If people want to read books that are rubbish, that's fine. I'd be throwing away books that're blatantly sh1t.

Because, y'know, there's Caitlin Moran books, and Alastair Campbell books that're just ripe for throwing away. But at the same time, I don't want to do anything immoral, or be a book fascist. Eh?

@Karina-Kara Play it cool, Trig...

It occurs to me that I've never had an unrequited love situation (that is, you're in love, but they don't love you). And I can't help feeling maybe I'm missing out on an essential part of the human experience. FO SHO, I've had unhappy romantic outcomes, but that's only after we've both been in love with each other, and it's come to a natural end.
What's it like to be full-on in love, but it's impossible for you to get anything back, and it's dead before it even begins? I'm fascinated. I mean, I dote on 'Antic Hay' by Aldous Huxley, but I'm pretty sure that guy just makes stuff up. If you're inclined to be philosophical or spiritual, did it feel like the universe was somehow keeping you in your place? Or did you retain a LINGERING DOUBT that actually, your romantic target would have reciprocated your emotions, if only he or she had got to know you better? Or did you just take it on the chin?

So, yeah. Come ye and GUESS THE CELEBRITIES, based on the drawings I've just done. (each one took 4 hours). The winner or winners will get ...nothing except EXTREME kudos and big-ups (but let's face it, isn't that what we're all here for?)

There's three you need to guess, starting with the easiest, ending with the toughest. Further clues will be available if enough people pester me.

Clues: 1: First became famous in the early 90's. 2: Famous as both a musician and actor, and has made the following types of film: serious drama, sci-fi, comedy, voice talent in animated films. 3: good at dancing.

Clues: 1. Not a musician or actress. 2. American. 3. Became famous in the 90's under very dodgy circumstances.

Clues: 1. Mainly famous in the 70's. 2. A very divisive figure, loved by some, hated by others. 3. Very famous musician, but hasn't been in the charts for a very long time.

Good luck. GLORY AWAITS YE IF YE HAVE THE COURAGE FOR THE GUESS.

@DayShifter GGGRRR. CONGRATULATIONS thru gritted teeth) You got one already. 2 is Lewinsky. But yeah. It can't be Bob Dylan because there's no little beard. Same sort of era, tho.

@heyitszoey This is great. Stuff like this would make cool graffiti (notwithstanding that graffiti is antisocial and 'wrong' - (smirk).

@heyitszoey ...and the government thinks, 'YESSS! Those perpetual tears will solve our water shortage'.

But then they just flood the world.