ANYBODY HERE IN THIS FORUM EVER BEEN TRULLY IN LOVE?

[Didac]

I hope you all are in good spirits. I've been having issues with my wife that were never an issue before. Lately, my wife gets triggered by anything I say. We tend to quibble over semantics almost every day, which really upsets me. I've been with her since we were in high school. We were also neighbors, which made it convenient.

Over ten years ago, I made a monumental mistake. I ended up meeting someone through work, and the moment I met her, I felt butterflies, as corny as it sounds. Eventually, we would get together but never hooked up because she was in a relationship, and I was married. About ten years ago, she broke up with her boyfriend, and I was struggling to stay in my relationship. We realized we were into the same things. I love to work out and engage in extreme sports like skydiving.

Anyway, I realized that I had fallen in love with her but felt really ashamed that I didn't break up first before developing feelings for someone else. I eventually moved out within a couple of months of meeting her at a work event. I never expected that she was into me. We ended up hooking up after five work events. I held back because of my marriage. I broke the rule one day when I got intoxicated with her, the same day I asked my wife for a divorce.

I lived separately for almost two years, but my kids made it clear that if I remained in the relationship, they would avoid seeing me at all costs. In an effort to remedy my marriage, I broke up with my girlfriend, which really hurt me. My wife and I began couples therapy, but to be honest, I was never into it. I realized that I moved back home because I was afraid that without me, my teenagers and my wife would not be able to cover living expenses.

It's been over ten years, and I still think of her every day. I never removed our pictures from my phone so I could see her when I'm sad. Is there any hope that I can rekindle my relationship with my wife despite being hung up on my ex?