• I just like hearing about people's cool stories. Maybe you've gotten bit by a shark or you have done drugs and had a crazy experience or maybe you drank too much and had a wild night or went on a vacation, ate bad food, and had insane diarrhea, what ever it is I want to hear it! Even if it is a story that you don't think is cool but you still want to share it, now is the chance!

  • Hella Assassins Fake Moderators GSP Patrol - The Proofreaders

    @TheGoldenMole When I was 6, I had a real nasty cold and knew my mom would force me to drink cough syrup before bed. So before she came upstairs, I dumped an entire bottle of it into my toy box. When she asked where it went, I claimed my 4-year-old brother drank it all. When he denied it, they didn't believe him. He then spent the entire night at the hospital drinking liquid charcoal and having his stomach pumped.
    😂 😂

  • ...Ah, GM. I'm not going to give you 'A' material for free, completely out of context. But here's ...let's just call it my twentieth best anecdote.

    About 25 years ago, a pal and I finished work for the week and decided to blow a large portion of our wages on Go-Karting. Y'know? Go-Karting - driving round and round a circuit in a tiny hi-speed buggy. Well, anyhow, we were luvvin' it, and we totally lost track of time. We must have had about twenty races, over the course of about three hours.

    The problem came when the time came to go home: we got back to my pal's car, and his driving reflex was so attuned to the controls of the tiny little go-kart (which raced round at about 60mph as standard), that he put his foot down and we drove STRAIGHT IN TO A TWENTY FOOT WALL MADE OF LORRY TYRES. The tyres bounced everywhere. But we didn't have the luxury of being able to go into shock, because the swarthy gypsies who ran the Go-Karting place ran towards us with murder in their hearts. We sped away. They gave chase in their own vehicle. They chased us for about half a mile, then gave up. By that point, I was laughing, but my mate was really terrified. Y'know that episode of Alan Partridge where he has to escape from a stalker across random countryside? It was that kinda vibe. At one point, our escape took us through a ford which gave a VERY dramatic splash.

    The moral? Don't dick around.

  • One Woman Army

    Alright, here's the real deal on why i am "me" in the first place:
    Back in spring, 2012 something happend to me at the big break in school.
    I was 12 and a half years young when i suddenly started to think in an completely different way from one moment to another.
    As i was leaving the school building inside the busy crowd of pupils and going outside to the schoolyard, i stood on the stairs and looked around. My view was somewhat unfocused, my head angled slighty towards the ground.
    Then, it struck me. Like some kind of entity had "flipped a switch" inside my head, turning on my critical thinking.
    There was absolutely nothing that could have induced it in any way. I stood there alone amongst the crowd.
    After it happend i immediately questioned myself as if something had just happend right now.
    I looked around, confused, like my higher consciousness had been replaced with another.
    But i was still "me", yet different. Not long after that, i had become more attentive at school. My grades suddenly improved by a magnitude, i started to do all of my assigned homework in time and with diligence.
    Not only that, but i also started to attack back when i got bullied. Even at my Karate lessons i became more and more aggressive and effective. I had a yellow belt at the time and ended up with a brown belt after i have quitted it.
    And because i got so good at everything, i started to question everything around me even more then i did before. It is like i have been "awakened". I was always more mature and knowledgeable then the others, but that occurence had increased my intellectual capabilities by a tenfold at least.
    And with it being said, i am not sure what to do with it. Thanks to "it" i am unable to live a normal and social live with others...

    Up to this late day, i still am unable to explain what exactly had happend to me at that event. I know that nobody except me and all the other children were there on the schoolyard. Not even a single teacher. No one had any physical contact with me. It is as if some "angel" or ghost had touched me on my head and thus activating my critical thinking. Because of this, i cannot say that all the knowledge that i have acquired thus far is of mine responsibility or that i would have done it on my own. Something wanted me to become intelligent. But why?
    Without that event, i would have never made it this far nor would i have had a personal research about this world and about my life(s) in general.

    That was one tale. But i have another one aswell.
    It was the time where i first had gotten properly drunk on a birthday party.
    I was this time 17 years young. I had tried a couple of beers out here and there before that despiceable day, as well as some shots of vodka. That was my only experience. The day before i had gotten very drunk with beer only, but i was still conscious about everything i was doing and happening around me. I even exaggerated my drunken behaviour because i was able to fake it very well.
    So. About the day. THAT day . . .
    Someone threw a birthday party and i was invited with some others. But because of my aggressive character that i once maintained, i started the trip with some centiliters of Jägermeister. On an empty stomach, that is.
    At that time i knew next to nothing about proper alcohol consumption. I wanted to be brave and drink as much alcohol as i was able to. I wanted to get drunk! Really drunk this time.
    And my wish had been granted.
    I blacked out. Complete memory loss (mental blackout).
    I still do not remember what had happend when i overdosed with a 2,19 ‰ blood alcohol level. You get declared as "clinically dead" here at german hospitals with a blood alcohol level starting at 2 ‰.
    Did i suffer any damage from that evening and night? Except for an unfathomable shame and loss of my glory because of my actions, i am doing completely fine up to this day. I only am unable to remember what had happend. The caretaker was even amazed who self-aware i was after waking up. I had disappointed my parents in every possible way because of my actions.
    Now you are wondering what i actually did back then.
    Allow me to explain:
    After i finished the almost empty Jägermeister bottle on the bus, i went to the party and started with some beer or two. Then some hard liquor in form of very small bottles. "Shot bottles", 6 or 7 of these. Then a plastic cup filled with beer and vodka. Then 3 full metal flasks of pure vodka. I was chugging the flask in the nearby park with some others who were from the party. They were smoking weed. I refused to smoke it, even after it being offered to me numerous times. After that, i had gotten really drunk. I returned every now and then to get the flask refilled. The boys were laughing at my drunken manner. I also had started to get hungry. Only alcohol was inside of my stomach. The birthday boy had just turned 18 years and wanted to celebrate this special year. And i single-handedly managed to completely ruin it. He had a rather small swimming pool at his house and i wanted to join the two others who were already inside of it. I was still conscious enough to take off my non-swimming clothes, folding them neatly together and putting them under a table and jumping inside the pool. They were playing with a pool ball and i was never able to catch it. Of course, i was wearing my swimming clothes, a bra and panties, underneath. You have to be prepared for everything.
    That was the last moment i am still able to remember on my own.
    From here on now these things have been told to me by others. Mainly from the birthday boy:

    ✲ I lost my swmming clothes. I was completely naked after i went out of the pool, screaming and shouting.
    ✲ I went to the park and smeared myself with soil and grass all over my body. Celtic body war paint style.
    ✲ I puked at his girlfriend who wanted to help me up. Serveral times. The helping and puking part that is.
    ✲ I lied laughing on the front porch of his house. His neighbours had witnessed that.
    ✲ An ambulance had to be called because i lost my consciousness at some point later.
    ✲ The party was over because of me and the ambulance. Luckily, the police were not involved in this.

    The most recent memory i am able to remember after what had happend was where i was on the hospital bed at night and a nurse was saying to me that i am currently at the hospital. She then wanted me to empty my bladder which i surely did. The whole thing she had offered me got filled up to the brim. What a relief!
    Then i woke up the "next" day. It was still the same day, because the whole event happend through midnight. After i realized what was going on, a caretaker for teenagers who abused alcohol had ben dispatched to look after me. But i made him sure that i did not required his assistance at all. Later on my parents arrived and told me the rest of what i had missed.
    After the weekend had passed, i went back to school on monday. The first class was physics and the birthday boy immediately went up to me.
    He was worried sick after what had happend. But we has mainly concerned about his own hide because i was only 17 years old and i could have sued him officially as he had offered me alcoholic beverages. Hard liquor is not allowed for underage people here in Germany. Beer and wine is fine, but vodka, scotch and such are not.
    And because of that, he promised me that the video that had been made where i was shown naked would be deleted if i would not indict him. He would personally make sure about it. So the deal had been made on the very day i returned to school.
    And this is why i no longer consume any alcohol. Not even chocolate filled with it in any way.
    I have other ways to enjoy myself. No alcohol required for me. And it burns like hell.
    Seriously, why would you even want to do that on your own? Liquor tastes bad and it smells awful to me.

    ✲ 4 posts remaining.

  • @Кara K, these anecdotes are great. And I hope I'd speak for everyone when I say that you're probably completely blameless for the alcohol episode; at that age, alcohol is a weird, unpredictable siren call.
    And the way you recount your mental 'switch flipping' is very cool, too. Not rushing to draw any conclusions, but at the same time not underplaying the significance of it. I've always been fascinated by stories of people recieving inhuman knowledge and inhuman drives. In a lot of ways, I think Joan of Arc is as interesting a story as The New Testament. And you've probably read it already, but 'Valis' by Philip K Dick, the autobiographical novel telling of his mystical interaction with an alien satelite —what a book. But your story also reminds me a little bit of that classic novel —I think maybe it was Childhood's End by Arthur C Clarke, where adolescents start to evolve intellectually and get much, much wiser, and the olderz get totally unnerved, but they know they can't complain. Or maybe it was something by John Wyndam. TRULY I AM A SCI FI NOVEL MISREMEBERER.

  • The BatSheep

    @Кara wow ... .actually speechless 🙊

  • @Saloniii said in INSERT YOUR STORY HERE:

    @TheGoldenMole When I was 6, I had a real nasty cold and knew my mom would force me to drink cough syrup before bed. So before she came upstairs, I dumped an entire bottle of it into my toy box. When she asked where it went, I claimed my 4-year-old brother drank it all. When he denied it, they didn't believe him. He then spent the entire night at the hospital drinking liquid charcoal and having his stomach pumped.
    😂 😂


  • Hella Assassins Fake Moderators GSP Patrol - The Proofreaders

    @TheGoldenMole i was lol 😂

  • Fake Moderators

    I'll remember this after I finished my go-kart driving 😂

  • @Кara I agree, alcohol sucks! I don't think you ruined his birthday though, he saw a naked girl I think the last think he would do is complain 😂

  • Watch Anime Eyes Music Lovers Gamers

    Once upon a time there was a dog....................... and he died.

    The End.

  • @Indrid-Cold If I didn't want to dick around before I definitely do now! Don't worry though, I already drive like I'm go kart racing 😂

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