Posts made by NekoNat

Hi again.
It has been literally forever since I last logged on, especially because my IP had been banned for a while for unknown reasons. But today I decided to attempt logging on and then I thought you guys deserve an update.

My first post on here was a call for help. I was in desperate need of a form of encouragement after a messy breakup. Later there have been extra details emerging about that previous relationship that I once left out. One being a week after the first breakup where my ex at the time convinced my parents to come home with me, and at night he would then force himself upon me, and how he would "give my current boyfriend permission to have me".

But all of that is years ago now. And for reasons related to that, but also unrelated, I am now regularly attending therapy.

I am soon graduating from the gymnasium that I attend, and I hope to take a bachelor and perhaps a masters in animation or concept art or simular. If everything goes well, I will be moving to the States to study and move in with my boyfriend, with whom I will have 2 years anniversary next week! Yay!
Our relationship has been tough of course, but with little resistance from my parents, which goes radically against my original expectations. Given how much my mum has worked against my prior relationships. In fact after the first time he visited in summer of last year, they have been incredibly supportive and loving of him! They have taken us places, cooked all kinds of traditional danish food he has never tasted, and suggested places for us to go and see. Heck, Christmas last year my boyfriend arranged with my mum to travel here for a surprise visit during the entire holiday! And even with covid restrictions, we still managed to have a lot of fun while he got a taste of our traditions here at home.

Most things have brightened up since my last couple of posts. I am still struggling with things. I have quite a substacial amount of symptoms for mental stuff... Whether it be depression or ADHD or anxiety.. They're all there, making things harder. But I hope that I will recieve tools to work with this, once my therapy sessions are over, despite there probably not being an actual diagnosis.

Thank you for reading, and sorry for the rant! :)

@laxus2099 yea, I do

I am not sure why my IP being banned i don't done anything ?

@Bobfoot777 Ellow, Happy V-day

Happy valentines day Haido-kun, again XD

@yash1234 Eyo

@Hyde Thank you Haido-kun! I really do feel your support. I am happy I am not entirely alone in this ^^

@Hyde thank you once again. I guess there are just different ways of neglecting support and trust. Sadly it cannot be changed, only fought against. I'd hate to cut contact with my parents to have them quit trying to control me, because despite this, I of course still love them.

@pardis2001 I see. It seems there's only room for support in one single area, even you then see the double standards forming when it suddenly doesn't suit the moment.

@pardis2001 No, It's never nice to hear. The lack of general support from my very closest family isn't exactly nice either, but I suppose it must be worked around.

@pardis2001 She meant both. She just said one of you.

@ODIN I guess it taught me love is a two way thing. You're not the only one who has to give out your heart, piece by piece.

@Hyde thank you once again for all your help and support ^^

@Matt_Aranha To be honest, yes, I am afraid so. I can't move away at the moment though because of studies. But also from what I have learned, growing up and watching my parents relationship, is that I apparently commit on a whole other way than they do. But she sadly never have been able to understand my mind works differently ... And my dad is kind of just, standing by, passively.

@Matt_Aranha Thank you a lot for your reply. The thing is, my mom has been trying to mess things up for me in the past, which is why I am afraid she might do again. Especially with the way she said these things. She literally "ordered" me to not fall in love with this person. (God knows I am already head over heels for them), and then started a long rant about how it never works out, not having actual proof to back her up.

@pardis2001 She literally accused her own daughter, me, of being able to cheat.. Which I am physically and mentally not able to. Besides, it is not like she is known for her never ending support and love... It's not like anything I do has much support from her.

So it's been just about two months now. Again thank you for all the support with my very first post. A lot of things happened since then... Let me fill you in.

So I started getting some friends here after my first post. You helped me a great lot, and I got connected though other media as well - Including Discord. And you guys really made me happy. I finally realised what a bit of friendship is worth, and you were there for me.
A couple of weeks later, suddendly, my ex wants me back again. Telling me he misses the things we used to do and the attention and everything. I tell him that I know what he wants. He wants all that comes with a relationship, just except the commitment and the title. And I can't devote all my time and attention to someone who can't love me back. I told him this.
He showed up after school at some point. The 6'th of January to be precise. We talked, we went to a café and got milkshakes, talking all of this out. He wanted me back, he got a bit too close for my comfort.
He kissed me.
I told him that it felt wrong. I told him that I wouldn't promise him anything. I told him I didn't know what I wanted. I told him I didn't want to go back to what we had before.
Guess communication wasn't right.
Next day I was texting a new friend... And we got along really well. Got really close and honestly? I felt interested in him, and he seemed interested in me too. We kept on. At night, we'd call together and talk.
But then of course, new shit was about to happen. My ex had logged onto my discord. He had been reading through all the messages been sent throughout the day, everything. He went as far as to calling the person I was talking to, via my discord, talking to him about all this. Then called me, about 15 times at around 3 am, then, when I finally picked up, he called me out for all of this, yelling at me, saying he had come back to help me and be there for me. I got furious. But I was so sad at the same time all I said was: "I can't forgive you for this. If you can't keep yourself off of my social media, even when were not together, I can't trust you in a relationship. I made no promises for you, and I owe you nothing" I just ended up hanging up and I haven't spoken to him again.

This turned out to be my closure. I finally realised that was never going to get better. Besides, I had found a new love interest... Who apparently loves me back. So I am happy now. Things are on a whole different scale than before. I realised how much I was missing before...
Now comes a new problem.... It is a distance relationship
Not that either of us find it a problem, we believe we can make it work.
Problem is my parents. Or, mostly my mom.
She literally told me to "not fall in love with (person)" And that a distance relationship never works and all of that... She went as far as saying, directly to me that "let's imagen you were in a distance relationship for, let's say, three years. One of you would end up cheating". And she just got me annoyed at this point with her lack of support. But I am also terrified that she may work against us and make it difficult.
But it really shouldn't be her decision to make though, should it?
She shouldn't have any saying in it?

I don't know what to do now. I thought things were so much better, then it dropped again...
Sorry for my ranting.. once again...

@Micheal-sylar-0 mhm... Messaged you..

@Micheal-sylar-0 I can pm u it... I guess..

@Micheal-sylar-0 ...I have instagram