• because LIVING WITH IT FUCKING SUCKS! just got back from the hospital because i had breathing issues which i have had for awhile now . shallow slow breathing, best way i can describe it. anyway i was told i had bronchitis. but here is that anxiety part. i ALWAYS ask to look at my blood workup numbers. not only that, i always ask if they are even SLIGHTLY off, omg why!???? is that normal? are you sure??? etc fucking etc. my blood pH number is a bit below the cutoff of normal...here is me in a panic "omg im gonna get alkalosis". same with my c02 numbers running just a tad bit high, they feel it is due to my constant sleep apnea that retains it throughout the day. i was beside myself "omg kidney/lung failure"! i cannot fucking keep going on living like this. ran off my family, friends. wanna talk about someone that SHOULD end it all, or feels like it sometimes? i am terrified of death and how it might all happen healthwise. i would never wish that looking over your shoulder life upon anyone! it is so damn tiring. anyway i guess i must just accept "ok the dr's have said you are healthy, trust them". my answer is , "no i am HEALTHIER, but not healthy"

  • I am also living with anxiety, i take a medication and see my therapist biweekly to treat PTSD. So I know what you're talking about. You're not alone. It's not uncommon to ask for the details of your blood work, its ok for them to be a little off, theres a margin of what is considered safe. They'd take action if it was something serious. But I get what thats like having that nagging thought in mind that always thinks of the worst possible outcome. Living with anxiety is a hard way to go through life. It's constricting, uncomfortable, relentless, and its exhausting. We all have worries from time to time, but it dissipates. But when your worries are capable of going 0 - 600 mph at a moments notice and maintain speed. . . .its not how life was meant to be. Have you thought about seeking help with your anxiety? If you haven't, i highly recommend it. I didn't want to reach out for help for the longest time. I was uncomfortable with having to tell another human face to face that was concerned about my mental health with regards to anxiety. There was some guilt and shame as well as. . . you guessed it, anxiety. But I wasn't getting any better, and my anxiety was starting to affect those around me, family, close friends, and work. I made the leap one day and set the appointment. Best thing I ever did for myself- bar none. The medication I'm taking is a life saver, its such a relief. and with talking with my therapist we've been working on my PTSD and coping with the traumatic event. You know, im not gonna lie. I still worry about things, but with the help of the therapy and meds combined, im able to do just that, worry. I can worry like a normal person, I don't go to those darks scenarios and morbid "what ifs" that only endure more anxiety. But if you'd ever like to talk about it, know that I'm here. And believe me when i say, I know what you mean by being healthy, but not at your healthiest. much love my dude.

  • I had severe GAD but overcame it two years back, aahh it was terrible. My suggestions would be to get over those fears by not overthinking about the stuff thats causing you anxiety and facing it head on.

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