Im working on this writing and like I dunno how to continue... feedback???



  • Thats a kind of a really good book or the start of a good story i readed it now all down and i don't know really what i can tell you or how i can help you to go far with it but i am sure you will have an good idea by yourself as someone who did an own biography book some years ago i can tell you let yourself time and when you need ideas take inspirations from other books, movies, peoples or at least music i am not a writer myself i also only write lyrics for songs or poems for myself it's not the same i guess but it comes nearby on your work
    I really appericate peoples with such a good style of writing
    you are really skilled


  • @Hyde Thank you ^^


  • @Deimat I wasn't really helpful (^^) but i am sure you will find the right words for it like said ~~~ if you need inspriation for it maybe you are willing to listen up to one of my lyrics i am not sure if it would be helpful at least (laugh) but artists helping artist ~ ^^ i will follow you :3


  • @Deimat This has a Lovecraftian vibe, I am intrigued. You could do some world building, expanding on the characteristics of the community, introducing some secondary characters, then elaborating on what the myth of the "child of eden" is, how did it allegedly started, something like that. If you are intending on writing a short tale, I would suggest you start with your main character and narrator recalling how they got to know the History of Bella, and go from there. It is a very interesting concept BTW this Eye of Duality.


  • @Thales_BG Thankies ^^ I'm already developing some side characters rn actually


  • @Deimat I'm so proud of you girl. The way that the story starts..it has that "I'm gonna make you wanna read more, so STAY" vibe. The introduction is indeed beautiful, the little details in the beginning are catchy. Though I would have loved to know a little more about Bella, try to add the eloquent words here and there if you may..words that will coerce the reader to search things up. Being a die hard reader I can surely say "so far so good" . Just work things up with the characters and it'll be "perfecto"..also whilst I was reading your book, Ruskin Bond suddenly popped up in my head...the visual style of your story kinda reminds me of him.
    I'm sure you're gonna create a good one, and I'm always there if you need me. XO❤️


  • @Anastasia-Smith thanks hun! I'll keep on writin and hope that it all works out, atm Im describing the narrator and Ive used the narrator's self proclaimed lofty-headedness Ive been able to ramble without feeling as if Ive fully broken voice although its still in testing stages so who knows if I'll even have this whole page Ive been working on today loll


  • @Deimochi really nice 👍🏻