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Bristol meet up I’m bored

Relationships

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Adil
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Hi there I’m a uni student who is stuck in town all day anyone about to hang out I’m stuck in my car to avoid a ticket
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A

Adil
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Come on bois I’m dying out here
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lbarby lopez

Hi, my name is Barbara, I'm 43 years old. Is there anyone who has a fetish for smoking cigarettes?

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Amin_1

we have been together for a year , at first she had a completely anxious attachment style
I liked it , i loved her because of that
but suddenly she acts completely avoidant
maybe i am overthinking , or maybe she is playing with my feelings , i don't know anymore

I have a lot of details and i don't know what to say or when to start
I literally can't focus on anything else , i can't work can't sleep can't

I still love her , despite she recently hurt me a lot ,ignored and disrespected me many times (she was completely the opposite before)

I care about her and worry why she changed more than my own feelings that have been ignored or hurt

I told her many times that i notice her change and i know she is not alright , she keep replaying in cold dry conv and saying she is fine and i don't have to worry about it

I don't know if she just lost interest or she is going through a lot

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Amin_1

i have a chinese GF and i need some advice , thank u ~~~

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Matt_Aranha

@allallalalalla You deserve better, and you need to have the hard conversation with him. Fear of breaking up is not a healthy reason to stay together; he has deceived and disrespected you.

I feel so much for what you're going through, the pain and angst must feel crushing at times... but if your relationship can't survive him the aftermath of him reading an honest letter about how you feel, that should tell you all you need to know about your future together

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FebLean

Hello Mam, I am virgin and single by choice, but this should not limit me to give you my advice. You can take my advice or not, it's really up to you. Well as you see, our modern times really shapes our culture and our everyday life. Many relationships have struggles to these complexities and how they can fully understand there partners. But the advice there is to put it simple, talk with him open heartedly about what you are uncomfortable with. Because for me you are not just his girlfriend but a very wife material. We are born to be a submissive, an attention seeker, and their protector at same time. Please listen to this madam, NEVER EVER DEGRADE YOURSELF or LOOK AT YOURSELF SO SMALL, because you are actually worth than any rubies in this world because you truly love your man. It's just that he needs to realize you value by opening these all up to him. I know that open communications can solve a relationship problems. Be strong and never ever compare yourself to any onlyfans girls out there, it was just their job but sometimes men can turn their vices to obsessions and it can ruin their lives. Just don't be so overdrive by your emotions, learn to shield yourself from pain and calm your waves so that you can state everything in logical and reasonable order. Because oftentimes, a relationship can be miserable when you argue with emotions and what you just feel. You are a strong woman but you need to realize your boundaries, I need you to also find your own happy healthy place and don't just revolve your life to your man. Always asks yourself if everything is right. Because I believe that love is never be enough, because sometimes we can say that we love the person, we can show that through sex and actions, but how about us? we can lose ourselves at anytime. So even in a relationship, have your own personal goal and growth. Listen to podcast, learn to meditate, surround yourself with good friends, be outgoing, and pray. I know it will be a tough time as you heal yourself, but believe me, you can, and after that, just return to your man if he really belongs to you. Lovelots.

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allallalalalla

To be completely honest, I really don't know how to start this confession. Sorry in advance if this is too long, l'll try my best to keep it short. I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for approximately 5 years. I love him and I think that he loves me as well, or at least that's what l'm trying to believe as a coping mechanism. I'll say it as raw as it is, he unfortunately doesn't want to have sex with me anymore. He says he is tired from work, it's never the right time (sometimes our working schedules differ but not always), he said he wants to just chill etc. I completely understand someone being tired from work and needing some time and space for themselves to recharge, but we have sex one time every 4 months or so and only because I have to tell him hey yk I'm hor*y. Most of the time the answer is something along the lines of "how?" Or "I'm not in the mood rn, I'm tired" yada yada. I started getting suspicious because this behavior has been going on for years and I always tried to make sense of his excuses so l brushed it off. But I think that this is not a healthy relationship. Yeah ok I know it's not only sex but it's sex as well that has to be balanced to feel loved and appreciated as a woman, at least that's my perspective. So, unfortunately I got the decision to search his mobile phone. Obv I know that's not the right thing to do but I got so messed up with my emotions and I did it. I wish I didn't. He doesn't follow any nsfw content on instagram tho his feed was full of semi naked models, nstw cosplayers, thirstraps, onlyfans models etc. Oh dear lord that algorithm doesn't lie cuz his search bar was like that as well.

I tried to brush it off as well trying to remain calm and focus on finding a way to relax and deal with this awful situation as a mature adult person. Until I saw that in his notepad has tags and links of onlyfans... Approximately 1 or 2 years ago he opened his gmail to send me some files via email I happened to catch a glimpse of an onlyfans subscription. I made it very clear that this is not acceptable. He said that he did it out of curiosity because he said that the said person was not a si*t and not because he wanted to jerk off. I somehow believed at him and chose to forgive him and move on. Unfortunately I found in his notepad tags of onlyfans models and onlyfans links. I chose to see them. My self esteem is so broken. I feel so bad about being me. I feel like a nobody to him. I feel like I don't deserve to be loved and have a sexual relarelationship with anyone, especially him. I feel like I'll never be enough. And this is the truth. And this is tearing me apart from inside out. Right after I saw all that, I wrote a big letter expressing my emotions and thoughts saying that I'm full on to support him if he tells me the truth no matter how painful it is so that we can work through this together. I can't give this to him cuz l'm afraid that he will break up. I love him so much. Why did he do this to me? To us? Why? I woke him up right after and hid the letter. He hugged me and he said "you're beautiful". I started crying tried to hide it and then when I got left alone I started crying uncontrollably.. I feel so alone in all this.. and so hopeless.. I really don't know what the f should I do .. Thank you for taking the time reading this it means a lot and makes me feel a bit less alone Any advice appreciated

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Didac

I hope you all are in good spirits. I've been having issues with my wife that were never an issue before. Lately, my wife gets triggered by anything I say. We tend to quibble over semantics almost every day, which really upsets me. I've been with her since we were in high school. We were also neighbors, which made it convenient.

Over ten years ago, I made a monumental mistake. I ended up meeting someone through work, and the moment I met her, I felt butterflies, as corny as it sounds. Eventually, we would get together but never hooked up because she was in a relationship, and I was married. About ten years ago, she broke up with her boyfriend, and I was struggling to stay in my relationship. We realized we were into the same things. I love to work out and engage in extreme sports like skydiving.

Anyway, I realized that I had fallen in love with her but felt really ashamed that I didn't break up first before developing feelings for someone else. I eventually moved out within a couple of months of meeting her at a work event. I never expected that she was into me. We ended up hooking up after five work events. I held back because of my marriage. I broke the rule one day when I got intoxicated with her, the same day I asked my wife for a divorce.

I lived separately for almost two years, but my kids made it clear that if I remained in the relationship, they would avoid seeing me at all costs. In an effort to remedy my marriage, I broke up with my girlfriend, which really hurt me. My wife and I began couples therapy, but to be honest, I was never into it. I realized that I moved back home because I was afraid that without me, my teenagers and my wife would not be able to cover living expenses.

It's been over ten years, and I still think of her every day. I never removed our pictures from my phone so I could see her when I'm sad. Is there any hope that I can rekindle my relationship with my wife despite being hung up on my ex?

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ThisBurner

So I really really like my girlfriend, however every type I try to talk to her she feels like I'm attacking her (when I'm really not trying to, I just be expressing how I feel and I don't really like doing that).

She has a type of guy and it's the "hood" dude and she even told me she was trying something new. When we first started dating (2 months ago) she was very caring but now she's seems a bit disappointed. What I mean by that is she tells me things like
"I'm too nice."

"I'm too honest"

"I'm clingy"

And she tells me that she not an affectionate person (even though she was when she was younger).

I'm trying my absolute best to work it out because I really fuck with this girl and I don't like people fr. My intuition telling me she cares for me however I don't think she cares for me as her boyfriend.

A little bit of background, when she was down on her luck I was the only one there for her.

Because of this I feel like she doesn't like me but feel obligated to date me.

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Z
zeeek

@Belle18 said in My boyfriend ignores me…:

for

You should ignore that bastard and find new this world is full of guys and for girls it's so easy to get one good luck

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Someone 0123

I don't agree with that last part, because looks aren't all that important. Listen to Courtney Ryan on Youtube. She says to watch what they do, not what they say. This comes back to that old saying: Actions speak louder than words. I can't tell you what to do, but based on what you've said, moving on should not be out of the question.

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Belle18

Maybe im still young and naive but I have been with my boyfriend for a few months. We are both 18 and he ignores me for days. My friends say to get a better boyfriend especially because I pay for everything and that I am pretty that I don’t need to be with an ugly guy. What do I do?

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Lochie

Ask yourself - is it worth arguing over? Make your feels known and ask to be invited next time, then accept it and move on. No use arguing and dragging it out, that will just hurt both of you even more.

I’m sure there was no intention to hurt you, those who invited him probably just wanted a boys trip, he may not have realised it was this important to you.

Also it is important for guys to hang out without their partners there, and same for girls to hang out without any guys around.

I think it’s understandable that you’re hurt, but don’t see either one of you as right or wrong personally.

It’s not how you feel that determines if someone’s in the wrong, but how the person that’s feeling them reacts to those emotions.

That’s my view on it anyway.

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Lochie

@Bethany123 I know it can be frustrating and quite draining sometimes having to explain every little detail to a grown man, as it feels like they should care enough to understand on their own - but men are different beings to women and do struggle with things that may seem standard or basic. That’s why women say guys are dumb! They’ll change a car engine or build an house but have no clue when it comes to issues like this. Also Emotional intelligence is learned so he may be missing out on seemingly obvious signs if he isnt at the level you expect of him with that.
if you love him and see a future together, then it’s worth the effort and time to mend it - it will eventually get easier.

Relationships can be hard work at times as I’m sure you are aware, but also very beautiful and if you believe that he’s the one, then I guess you’ll stick it out until he gets it - as the saying goes, nothing worth having comes easy, and nothing that comes easy is worth having.

Hopefully the goods outweigh the bads overall and eventually, there will come a time where your communication as a couple will improve so much it will reach a point where it doesn’t feel so draining to discuss things as you’re both on the same page when it comes to each others needs, desires, goals and things that need work, and both of you will naturally understand each others communication styles and love languages and will be able to work in with one another without any second guessing. It’s like anything, practice makes perfect.

Be persistent with letting your needs and feelings be understood yet be patient and kind in the way you explain it as he may not understand until you’ve said it in a way that resonates with him, which can take multiple tries of saying the same thing differently.

He may struggle with communication too so while you are communicating your side of things, ask him about anything that may be troubling him and see if you can both go on a journey of improvement as a team which will bring you closer and serve as a bonding experience of sorts.

Sorry if I’ve rambled on, I’ve just been in a similar situation and I believe this issue is easily fixed with patience, and calm conversation, and understanding of each other.

You’ve got this and good luck, I wish you both all the best.

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Bethany123

@Lochie Thank you, Lochie! You're so right about explaining it to him. The little things are so important...just wish I didn't have to always explain what I needed from him.

Thank you!

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Lochie

@Bethany123 I think you just need to talk about things more frequently and if you need love/attention to be shown in a specific way - spell it out to him, as if he is a child almost because guys sometimes don’t understand unless it’s very clear what you need.

Also no need to feel too embarrassed to talk about something on your mind if you’re in a relationship that you see lasting you should be able to say whatever you need without fear of judgement.

overall - I think the little things are just as important as the big things when it comes to relationships so make sure you communicate anything that troubles you and make any needs known that you’d like met before it becomes an issue and possibly an argument.

Hope this helps in some way.

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Bethany123

Oh boy...I think so. lol. Does anyone chat real time here?

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Bethany123

Because of this communication issue, he has unknowingly hurt me. I don't know if I should go into specifics here, but this is an example of his inability to recognize when he should show appreciation just crushed me. I got up early one Sunday, put on a little makeup and fixed my hair, then crawled back in bed to help him wake up. Afterward, he smiled, rolled out of bed and took a shower. No "thank you", "that was great", nothing...just went and took a shower. I was stunned. He didn't even give me a kiss.

I started to cry, got up and made some breakfast for both of us, all the while wondering if he didn't appreciate at all what I had done. The fact that it was sexual in nature also made me feel so embarrassed. He eventually came to the kitchen and ate some of the eggs and bacon I cooked, then said he was meeting friends to play golf. No big deal on the golf...he often plays golf on the weekends. But I was like, "WTF" all in my head because I was too embarrassed to even discuss it with him.

This is not the only time he has done this and I eventually confronted him about it...he had no idea how much he hurt me. I'm not a high maintenance woman, but I do need to feel appreciated. I honestly don't think he is aware in these moments and now when he overly corrects, giving effusive praise and thanks, I wonder if he is rolling his eyes at what he has to do to make me feel appreciated.

Thoughts? I would like to get married one day and at 46 and several years invested, I'm scared of being single again. Thank you.

This is just one

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Bethany123

Hello. I'm new here and have been struggling with whether the relationship I'm in has a chance or not.

The Good
We have been together now since late 2019. He is generally kind, but not really "loving" in day to day interactions. Sex is good most of the time.

The Bad
Communication is generally poor. Specifically, he seems be completely clueless on how to communicate appreciation, joy (other than the climactic moment. lol), sadness, etc.

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J
Jag

Personally I think your in the right, your bf should have at least question them instead of assuming it was a boys night

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2
2468022

@drinaaa2709 yessss I have a problem I need solution too
So my boyfriend and me hung out with a group of people a while ago nd then they made a plan for box cricket and invited only my boyfriend and not me whereas we became friends with them as a team and My boyfriend didn't feel offended that they didn't invite me until I point it out to him and upon being confronted he said he reacted that way bezz he somehow knew in thr back of his head that it may just be a boy's night but he literally wasnt sure of that fact still he didn't feel offended in the fact that they all invited him and not me nd he is saying my reaction or the need to fight with him abt it was wrong now someone tell me who is right in this situation me or my boyfriend

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2
2468022

So my boyfriend and me hung out with a group of people a while ago nd then they made a plan for box cricket and invited only my boyfriend and not me whereas we became friends with them as a team and My boyfriend didn't feel offended that they didn't invite me until I point it out to him and upon being confronted he said he reacted that way bezz he somehow knew in thr back of his head that it may just be a boy's night but he literally wasnt sure of that fact still he didn't feel offended in the fact that they all invited him and not me nd he is saying my reaction or the need to fight with him abt it was wrong now someone tell me who is right in this situation me or my boyfriend

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Q
Queeny

Relationship Rocky who can relate

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M
mike1993

i need help with overthinking. i'm having trouble in my relationship because of my insecurities. can anyone help me please. I feel no meaning in my life.

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Marriage feels over, but I feel stuck and lost
Relationships

TTrex1983 6 days ago
I've been with my wife for 19 years, married for 15 of those... on the whole I felt like we had an amazing relationship. She was my lover, but also my best friend, my soul mate, loving parent to our 4 cheeky children. We were on the same page on everything, and I felt like we could talk to each other about anything and everything.

Mid-COVID one of those conversations was about sexuality, and spicing things up. She wanted to try with other men involved, and she was curious what it would be like with other women involved - but quite strictly for her benefit, not mine. I like to think I'm quite open minded, so we joined a community and tried a few scenarios - not very successful... not like we went wow, this is for us, or anything like that.

From that, one guy that we met she started calling and messaging in private, kept everything to herself. She was falling for him to the point where she was ready to leave me for him... until... she realised he was gaslighting her, and it turned out he had a partner. It turned out things weren't as she thought they were. She broke things off, and at this told me all about it... I'd been completely unaware up to that point.

This was hard for me, but I loved her - I still do, and wanted to work through this. She didn't know what she wanted from here, but were to work things through and try to make it work.

From this point, the sex started to go downhill, we went from active most nights, to very inactive to now being sexless for the last few months. She's got a few health issues, both physically and mentally, so I'd put the drop down to these. Rightly or wrongly though I got suspicious, and found messages in her Facebook account to a guy, and the messages come across that she's throwing herself at him. I can't see replies from him, but from her messages, something happened between them, I just don't know what. A week ago she asked me at the dinner table with our kids if she could go to Paris by herself tomorrow... my response at the time was "We can't afford it" but I was later to find out in these messages that she'd asked this guy to go to Paris with her.

I like to think that I'm a helpful and supportive husband, I work my ass off, do as much as if not more of the childcare, and try to help with housework. She works less hours than I do, and is regularly out getting her hair or her nails done, or shopping.

I feel like I can't continue with this anymore... I wanted to try, but how many times can this happen and can I be put through this? I'm so low, I've lost all energy to fight for my wife, and my life. I'm lost and stuck. I don't have any friends to talk to - my friends went years ago when friends became our friends, my parents passed away before I reached 30, and I'm scared (as I hear so many times) that separating/divorce is going to leave her with the house, the kids everything. I'm left feeling like I have nothing worth living for and that I'm only here right now so that my kids aren't upset with the fact of losing me.

The common advice is to talk to her about it, but she doesn't want to talk about any of it, and just gets angry with me. I don't know where to turn, or what to do.

I'm here, just looking for someone to talk to, hopefully people that have been in the same situation, and how it worked out... lessons learnt... outcomes... positive and negative.
0
Aryan MhatreAryan Mhatre 6 days ago
Feeling sorry for you man......she isn't worth it
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Peek_A_BooPeek_A_Boo 6 days ago
Im sorry that you have to experience such, she has likely lost interest which sucks these days as more and more women become materialistic and give up gems like yourself for dumb rocks , it seems like both minds are made up just a hard reality of coming out on terms before she goes a step further.

At the bottom of comments there is a upvote/downvote section (up arrow/down arrow), upvote others where you can to help their reputation grow and as a thanks for them taking the time to comment on your post and they will also most likely return the favour too.
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@Trex1983 damn. What you are going through is a little different from my situation, but your pain feels so much like mine. I have no advice, because I came here for the same reason. It's so hard when kids are involved.. and hanging on to the feelings of love and closeness that you used to have. It's just so damn hard.

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MisterStrange

Life is too big for a lonely person, find new love, there is no way out obviously you need someone better.

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