Just don't do it please

[BOOTS22]

I seriously felt like I really needed to post this. So if any of y'all are depressed, suicidal, or honestly anything at all. Y'all need to talk to someone about it, you can either talk to me or the people that I'm going to list at the end of this. But seriously don't do it y'all please. The worlds not done with you yet. There are people who care about you and want you to stick around because they love you. Seriously I know what its like being at the bottom and you feel like there is nowhere to go. But like my girlfriend's signature say "If you are at the bottom the only place to got is up" and that is so damn true! Seriously even tho you are at the bottom and it seems as if everything only gets worse, trust me it will be worth it because something beautiful will come from that pain. Trust me I've seen just about everything and yeah I suicidal, I am depressed, I have anxiety, but the people who were there for me most was my family on here. Them and my girl are the only ones that saved me. But now I see that there is some much for me in life, and yeah I will have my ups and downs but when the downs come I am more prepared because now I know I have people that love me, and you know what so do you! Seriously even if you dont know me or the people I list just talk to them, they seriously can help a lot. So whatever you are going thru there is a light at the end of the tunnel and there are people who are willing to help you make it there and further, so please dont kill yourself there is so much to live for, no matter how badly someone screwed you up just remember we are all human we all make mistakes no one is perfect and we bleed when we fall down. So remember the only place to go now is up! And I wanna help you go up, and so would these people.
@Abby-83
@football_m29
@Kat_15
@Willoww
@RAGNAR
@US-poet
@Lucifer_
And there are a bunch more people who would love to help you! Sos seriously just talk to me or one of these people, or all of them. But whatever you do suicide isn't worth it.

[Willow]

@boots22 These are my favorite posts. Because it shows me that there are people out there who care.
The first time I attempted suicide, i was 12 years old. I had been experiencing severe abuse from my stepdad. And i decided that there wasnt a future for me. And i popped those pills. But yet...i woke up in the hospital. I had lived when I shouldnt have. A miracle is what they called it.
Just because i was a living miracle, did not mean I was happy and willing to turn my life around. I had severe depression and horrible anxiety. Most days it felt like it would be easier to be dead. Not that i wanted to be, i just felt that way.
And so I attempted four more times. I tried drugs twice, didnt work. Cutting my wrists. And the final straw for my mom was holding a gun to my head.
Never had I seen a care from my mom. She was a huge druggie and alcoholic. And when I moved in with my stepdad, she became...so distant. Often watched as he beat my face to a pulp. Laughing or just flat ignoring.
This was the only time i can remember at all my mom coming out of her high/drunken haze. And telling me not to do it. But God, I wanted to.
I gave myself this chance. My stepdad began to lay off me when i faded into the background. And so thats what i did. My grandma said that i needed to give life a chance. And things were good. My depression and anxiety still existed, but I was able to tame them just enough to seem normal.
Until he raped me. And impregnated me. The shame and trauma of those days ripped me apart. But I found one person, my grandma, who kept me going. Do yourself a favor, and find yourself that person.
When I moved in with my grandma
and we moved to the US, I had a new
positive mindset. She gave me the strength to keep going.
When I was sixteen I attempted suicide again. Cuts to the wrist. All because i never thought I could be loved. I didnt think that I could ever be attractive or cared for. But one lesson i learned, is to be patient. Because littl did I know, after I came out of my coma, my biggest crush was planning to ask me to prom the next day. But my suicide attempt tore away from that.
I did attempt suicide when i was 18, unimportant because i think you get the trend. The last time I attempted suicide was last month. And here is why i tell you this.
Most people feel that it is the end, their depression consumes them. Or that death would be easier for themselves and/or others.
I know I have felt all of these. Felt worthless. My depression, anxiety, panic, and PTSD leads to thoughts like this almost daily. But i remind myself how much patience has given me. So when you think of alllll the negatives. Think about positives. And if you cant, remember how far you have made it. Think about the finish line to the bad day/phase. You could almost be out of it, but you will never know, unless you persist. You will never know if you are dead. And you will never give yourself that opportunity, because you are the only one that can take the opportunity for a future away.
If I can do it, trust me, you can too

[Cassanova]

I was affected by mental depression at a very tender age. Due to that I had my studies screwed up, tried to suicide more than 3 times and I still don't have enough courage to stand up to even talk to someone face to face. Now all I do is sit in the last corner of the classroom, keeping my mouth shut all day long, come back home and shut myself in a room. And thanks to all those councilling seasons my school gave me, I'm titled the 'Mental Freak' in the whole school. In short, my life is so screwed up that I just feels like running away...

[rebelw.acause]

At first when I saw this title, I thought, "Whatever, someone's probably just trying to get attention." But after I've read some of @boots22 's posts, I kind of figured that this might be important. I read this a while ago, but I completely broke down and cried. That's kind of crazy, because I don't really cry (I've learned how to and how not to). I've known so much too early, and in middle school I know a lot of things even college-aged people don't know. It hurts and some days, all I want to do is kill myself. I have a battlefield of scars. Scars, bruises, scabs, and open bleeding cuts from my own doing. I just want boots and everyone else who has helped me make it this far to know that I love them (don't take that weirdly) and I thank them with the cut and bleeding heart that I have. Thanks guys, keep it up. Thank you soooooooooo much again. And now I should stop typing because my laptop is going to shortcircuit from the tears I'm crying right now.

[Michaelele]

True but, there will still be people who won't agree on that.

[Rabbitboy]

Even if I had never actually tried to end my own life.... I have a lot in my years of being lonely and uninvited to anything social in school it makes ya think messed up stuff like"I wonder if anyone would miss me, they don’t know me enough to care, does it make a difference?” And believe me..... who ever made those thoughts is not you no matter how you put it suicide is never an option but neither is silence even if people don’t notice it makes you feel a lot better to just talk with someone about it.. even if it seems like no one truly cares there’s always someone who does..... not all feelings can be seen you know.... and if you choose to bottle up your emotions you’ll never get the chance to show them to others don’t be afraid to talk even if you need to hide behind a mask just talk behind a mask no one will try to figure out just tell someone anyone just don’t let things get piled up it’s ok to cry but not to lie when someone asks you if you’re fine no one may notice but it beats having to lie then regret it......... just don’t end it ,start anew if you must cause restarting never hurt but giving up does for everyone who cares

[sup]

Thanks @Lucifer_ for helping me in almost everything.

[football_m30]

@rabbitboy very well said

[t_hollow19]

@boots22 I had contemplated suicide as well. Not only what you said is true, but the amount of pain and suffering in your life that you are (hopefully not) going to end, gives those who love you and support you even more pain and suffering than you had. Remember: YOU ARE LOVED!! YOU ARE RESPECTED! Don’t think that ending it will only affect you, it affects others as well. If you hate yourself, and there is no chance that you find a way to embrace and love yourself, still don’t kill yourself. Stay around for your parents. For your friends. For your partner. For the people around you that you see everyday of the week. This is how I got over my depression and suicidal thoughts. And I promise, you will find a way to love yourself eventually, it just depends on if you accept the fact that you are who you are. Everyone would miss you if you never showed up to first period. Everyone would miss you if you never showed up to the mid-term that you had studied for hours. Love yourself, and everything will be fine. I promise.

[BOOTS22]

@noonenightsky hey trust me I know what your a feeling and its not fun so seriously jjst keep your head up! And there's nothing wrong with crying it just shows how yoy have been strong for to long.

[Jack17]

@BOOTS22 keep on doing d gud work brother!!
Im sure ur post gonna help many others out dere.

[BOOTS22]

@jack17 thanks man!

[Michaelele]

@boots22 Yes we will. 😁

[football_m30]

@boots22 just remember no matter what’s going on in your life or mine I will always make time for a friend in need

[BOOTS22]

@football_m29 thanks bro!

[BOOTS22]

@willoww damn, I didnt realize it was that much! Seriously you only told me like a tiny bit. Seriously you deserve like a medal or something for enduring all that! You habe got to be the toughest bish I've ever met! Keep your head up please I can't loose you! I needs mah family! 🙏

[sup]

[BOOTS22]

@sup Damnit I forgot luci! 😱😱😱 and yeah luci is great!

[sup]

@TalkWithStranger WTF. Why cant i delete my own post????? It says "You dont have enough privileges for this action"

[BOOTS22]

@us-poet thank you! 🙏