I've lived with a monster, and I'll die a good man. But to be honest, from what I've seen... These monsters don't even know, they can't see how fucked up their life is, or that they have an issue in the first place. It's a very sad & lonley life for the monster. That's a long time of self hate, self conscious, and anger to deal with. I'd be happier to die a younger man good than bad though. I don't destroy people's lives.