Sometimes You Have to say a Hurting lie


  • Sometimes you just have to hurt those who you love with a very very very very BAD LIE! To save them from YOUR negative vibes


  • @Heccikage I'm not sold on this one...



  • @Heccikage My own inflexibility perhaps šŸ¤” I've not been able to think of a scenario which would warrant such a thing... but I'm not saying they don't exist.


  • @Matt_Aranha okay... But would you lie to a girl that loves you just so she gets away cuz you're not a good fit for her kinda energy?

    For example say sum like Ā«I don't like you and I'm back with my ex it's been a while. She's even 3months pregnant of my child Ā»


  • @Heccikage No, I'd be honest about my thoughts and feelings, and feel that lying would only be likely to make things worse.


  • @Matt_Aranha suure as a first try but then she still doesnt listen.

    Look at the path of a cold warrior like takezo miyamoto for example. Avid fighter only seeking to fight until no one rivals him. And he maybe get's a crush like Elisabeth from seven deadly sins who is Stronghead n a very good keeper btw.

    What do you think will make her wanna stay away from her crush, if not something that has to do with a betrayal?

    Getting back with your ex and having a baby with her is a strong betrayal argument.

    Don't you think so?


  • @Heccikage I don't, no. Breaking somebody with a lie like that? That's just cruel, and may hurt them more than the pain of staying around you.

    There is a choice to be strong and true. To say, "I don't believe I am healthy for you, so I must step away". If the person does not agree and persists in trying to communicate with you, you can ALWAYS refuse to engage. It may hurt in the short term, but people tend to understand and heal better from painful truths, and grow from them.

    This is a tangent but has some bearing; I personally feel that, being aware of toxicity, an element of responsibility also lies with the person you try to break from. Some people can be aware that another is unhealthy for them, and if they are 100% informed and knowledgeable about that then they absolutely have the right to continue to choose that person. By doing what you suggest, you take away their freedom of choice - and I would suggest that is disrespecting them.


  • @Matt_Aranha I agree with hecc's first comment only because if you lie in the first place, it's warranted to keep them away from you with the lie. Lies are negative vibes.


  • @Allison They are... so why not be a more honest, open person - and take those steps to change the vibe?

    I totally get wanting to do anything to save someone from your own toxicity, that's very noble. It's the having to lie to do it that I haven't got my head around... it feels more like an easy way out of owning your crap, and that saying you're doing it for the other person might just be something to help avoid feeling shitty about it. Perhaps šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø


  • @Matt_Aranha I didn't mention the essence of the lie. I only wanted to put emphasis on not being a negative person(and not lying is the first step).

    Terrible lies would not change the vibe one bit. If anything, it's instilling worse vibes for you to tear yourself apart over knowing you hurt someone. It's a SEEMING escape but likely something that'll pull you back with regret & you'll end up at square 1 except with a worse relationship. Seeing as how he's super sensitive over his gf, it's unlikely it would end any other way.

    super sensitive, let's just PUNCH her in the face then forget her for all of eternity & ignore her tears & pleas


  • @Heccikage I don't think so but instead sometimes you just need to tell lies if it can be good for others. :)


  • @kouhaichi said in Sometimes You Have to say a Hurting lie:

    @Heccikage I don't think so but instead sometimes you just need to tell lies if it can be good for others. :)

    Lol we're saying the same thing but in a different way. It's because that hurting lie will keep her from being damaged it's a good thing.


  • @Allison said in Sometimes You Have to say a Hurting lie:

    @Matt_Aranha I didn't mention the essence of the lie. I only wanted to put emphasis on not being a negative person(and not lying is the first step).

    Terrible lies would not change the vibe one bit. If anything, it's instilling worse vibes for you to tear yourself apart over knowing you hurt someone. It's a SEEMING escape but likely something that'll pull you back with regret & you'll end up at square 1 except with a worse relationship. Seeing as how he's super sensitive over his gf, it's unlikely it would end any other way.

    super sensitive, let's just PUNCH her in the face then forget her for all of eternity & ignore her tears & pleas

    However he he ends doesn't matter to him. He just wants her to be far from him. And also he's not tryna go to jail šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚.

    That's the sacrificial side of love I'd say. Killing yourself for someone's goodness. I can manage myself being hurt from my own bs, but trying to console someone else is a bit of addictional work.


  • @Heccikage Best topic I've seen here for a while, it's made a wonderful change from the stuff I usually see. Thank you.


  • @Matt_Aranha said in Sometimes You Have to say a Hurting lie:

    @Heccikage Best topic I've seen here for a while, it's made a wonderful change from the stuff I usually see. Thank you.

    Hahaha I'm flattered. ThanksšŸ™šŸ™


  • @Heccikage

    Your opinion is that the end justifies the means & you don't actually kill anything except your good side which actually cares & in the process you tear out her heart because she saw that in you.

    You're not doing anything for her "goodness". A part of her goodness is her not telling you to fuck off just because you're down or having negative vibes. A part of goodness is seeing goodness in everyone. You're just giving up on yourself & her & you're assuming a positive change would come from a negative one on the basis of you feeling that she deserves better.

    If you killed yourself for someone's goodness, it would be an ego death. You'd give her better rather than taking love away.
    Love isn't a mistake, only the lack thereof. & she thinks it's worth it despite things & apparently you can't handle that.

    She made her choice on you & you want desperately to prove her wrong because you don't believe in yourself & you're passing off your disbelief as part of that self you don't believe in the strength of(your love).


  • @Allison it's not a desperate move. Some people are built to just be alone.

    Regarding the negative vibes, I'd say it's just human nature. We find more pleasure into destructiveness as compared to buildiship. Ig because it takes almost 0 mins to ruin something.

    Building with someone is uncomfortable because it brings your "vulnerabilities" to light. Maybe physically you're strong but one side of your psych is still in a traumatic stage of your childhood or sum like that.

    That's why I used that manga figure as example. But nonetheless I'd admit the truth way is the right one but lying just makes it easier.


  • @Heccikage

    Okay so it's all because of your fear & pressure that you feel compelled to lie & you use an altruistic stance to make yourself feel better about it.

    My only advice here is to settle on what the relationship is. You can have relationships at low levels without lies.


  • no you should be honest for the best