Relationship/Legal Advice (help!)



  • Thank you for reading and for providing this service. My girlfriend who is 4 years older than me came to visit 3 months ago from another country( I live in the US and we’ve been talking online for the past 6 months). She is about to overstay her visitor visa. She thinks things are unclean due to past trauma and has gone so far to stop using her phone because she thinks it’s unclean. We have had several arguments and I have believed her to be acting at times. The arguments are awful and I hate it. She makes me wash my hands 30 times a day and won’t let me go to the store. She says it isn’t OCD and has now stopped eating for the last 26 hours. She hasn’t showered, or allowed me to shower for the last 7 days. (she won’t shower without me, because I have to be there to make sure she doesn’t touch anything dirty) I’m really scared. She’s in an awful spot and I want to help, but now I’m triggered every time she asks me to do something. She could soon be in trouble with the law and has threatened me with telling the police I’ve been neglecting her. She is fully capable physically to do things and move past the triggers. She uses it to manipulate me constantly. “I’ll let it all go if...”. I know I could be a better partner, I know she deserves better, I know I’m compromised due to the resentment. That said, I really feel like we are both victims at this point and both to blame. Neither she or I have anywhere to go. I have a special needs dog I take care of and little money. I just want to go about my life and not have to deal with her triggers any more. She won’t leave until everything is clean and I don’t know what to do. I can’t go on like this. She threatens my way of life and I don’t know what to do.


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