Friends are something that an average person needs. Humans are just made that way. But I think it's not correct to think that friends can fix everything, as well as that friends will stay in your life forever. Throughout life you will meet dozens of people and make many friends. But only one or two out of hundreds will be something you may call a "real friend". That's if you are lucky enough to meed someone with similar mindset and values that you have. People you call 'friends' will walk out of your life for different reasons (they may be insignificant or important) and will stay with you for different amounts of time. That's why I think that it's better if you put yourself/your life/feelings first most of the times when it comes to your friends. You can stay in a really good relationship with them even if you don't always put them first or give all of yourself into these relationships. Because each one of us have their own lifes to take care of. Those people who will want to stay with you and will understand you/love you - will stay. And those who don't - won't. Whatever you do for them. It depends on the mindset of the other party. Loving, helping, caring for your friends is great, but if you put them above other important things like yourself, then they will get used to it. And most people won't do the same for you or will try to use your love for their own emotional self-satisfaction. That's just how it is. So I think you just need to do everything in moderation and state values right in life.
Altruism and egoism. Are they really opposite?
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I think not. Not really. In my opinion, altruism is just the most social acceptable form of egoism. It’s important to note here that if you help people while being forced by some external conditions – that, of course, can’t be called altruism. When you are helping people in order to get additional benefits – that’s egoism itself. Altruism is when you are helping people because you want to. Eventually, one can conclude that you are doing it for yourself. Hence, Altruism is egoism.
There are many reasons why people do it. I don’t know if I am an altruist or not. But when I'm helping someone I feel good. Does that mean that I am a good guy? Of course... not. There can be a lot of reasons for such noble (at first look) desires, these are low self-esteem, that needs to be rised, vanity, arrogance and so on.
And I think that the reasons of altruistic behaviour listed above can be attributed not only to me.
I only hope, that maybe I am wrong supposing that there is no absolute altruism, and there are no people who feel gratuitous impulses to help people around.
I hope you are one of them.