Now i miss my old fella but he is on graveyard


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    I dont want to admit that i am broken.
    For almost 4 hours i am looking at ceiling, regretting all of things i have done in the past, swearing to god that i never did bad things, asking to myself like for the first time you cried because of A GIRL, you said you were in love with Judith till you almost got fired in your fast track program, you keep texting her like hella stupid one, you wrote all of that confession letters till you got many haters, most of your besties become your enemies, you granted for whatever she wishes, till one day she asked you to go, to forget her, to move on from her but you aint cry. Now you get broken, act like a stupid one, just because of a word "I cant beat her, the way you love her aint same like you love me".

    I remember the first time i cried because my Tamiya broken, it was the rare version i got because i won a game from my friends. I remember the second time i cried because my sister broke my Tamagotchi when she knew i got a rare dragon there. I remember the last time i cried coz i lost my friend in a war of ethnicity in terms of local Indonesian and Chinese. He said to me like "Look Aput, i may meet Jesus the time when you visited me in Jakarta when you are outside town, bring that medals to empower our pride. Dont cry when you cant meet me, save that tears when you feel broken because of a girl. Visit my graveyard and tell me how painful it is. You are a big guy in that time, pal"

    Lemme visit his graveyard tomorrow, coz i got the answer.






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