Is being emotionless good or bad?



  • Tell your opinions.



  • If you were emotionless, you technically wouldn't even be able to tell if it's good or bad. You basically wouldn't even be able to form an opinion of it.


  • Freedom Writers - Writing

    @hermes I don't know how it can be anything but bad. Being emotionless is similar to lacking empathy, something psychopaths have, and without emotion you won't care about anything, and so life just wouldn't be worth living. Your emotions drive everything, what you want, what's your desires, what you'll eat that day, everything, so without emotions, you would probably never make a decision.



  • @hermes 100% bad; I speak from experience here. When I was very young, for reason that would take me way too long to explain, I shut down all emotions. I refused to feel anything. For a while it was great, I didn't feel anger, I didn't feel sadness but as I got older I also didn't feel love, or happiness. Now as an adult, the people I care about call me cold and don't know if they are even loved by me. This is not a position I would want anyone to be in. Even though I have learned to show emotion, it's too late, the damage is done. And even though I have a family (wife and kids), I feel very alone...

    Show your emotions every chance you get. Good ones, bad ones, be honest with yourself. Don't become cold so you don't feel pain because then you won't feel love and you won't be able to give love in return. Trust me, you will regret it (if this is your plan).



  • @evan-elderson hi. Its so interesting to hear you speak like that. Im also married, f, trying to stay married. Trying to Keep myself in the marriage, as we have kids and divorce would be hard.. I owe it to mt kids to try to give them the best life i can.. but i feel so stuck personally and i feel like personally i have very few motivation to keep the relationship. And thats what the relationship is.. work.. if you ever wanna talk.. im around we can share ideas. Id love to pick your brain



  • @evan-elderson coming from a wife forgiving and trying to forget atrocities. Its very hard to look at the husband and not see the hurtful things, not remember the acts the words.. even when you try. In my case its very hard to open myself again once i keep getting hurt and keep dealing with hurtful situations over and over for over 8 yes even when he has promised to change and work on himself



  • @buttercup-rosie thank you for comments and I would love to talk (I am a talker). I appreciate your insight and I understand it. Like I told Us-Poet... she is doing back to me what I did to her and I have no right to act like a baby about it. But I am human and things do hurt me too. I see that now but it is so hard to get over it.



  • I thinks its bad



  • @us-poet well said.


  • Freedom Writers - Writing

    @evan-elderson yeah, relationships will fall apart if only one person isn't open and honest with how they feel. I had to learn that the hard way.



  • @us-poet the worse part about it is when you've finally figured it out and you are fighting to hold the relationship together but the other person doesn't believe you based on past atrocities you have committed. I can't get mad because I caused this but I also can't just give up.


  • Freedom Writers - Writing

    @evan-elderson I'm glad you're figuring out the problem and trying to fix it. It's nice that you want to fight for it, there's a real hope there then. I've gotten to the opposite, where instead of wanting to save it, I want to let it go. It took a bit to realize it, and every day something new comes up to make me realize that I'm done with it.



  • @us-poet I have put my wife through a lot of shit and she has stood with me, even as I continued to act like an idiot. About a year ago she decided to distance herself from me and talk to other men, to find herself so to speak... I owe to her to keep trying as she did for me in the past. Maybe one day we will come to a resolution. It is not easy for me to show love but I am trying.

    I hope you can find solace in the issues you are having... I am no expert at giving advice but I am a great listener if you ever want someone to talk to.


  • Freedom Writers - Writing

    @evan-elderson thank you. I really appreciate that. I sort of understand what your wife is feeling, and unfortunately for you, it may not end well. Everyone's different and maybe she'll realize she never needed it. How long have you been together?



  • @us-poet we have been married for 13 years and have 4 kids together... my problem is that she is doing what I did to her in the past and I am acting like a bitch about it; I have no right. It is that simple but it is still hard to squelch my feelings. I honestly think it is too late...


  • Freedom Writers - Writing

    @evan-elderson I don't really think it's fair in either direction. I think if you've been forgiven for it, then she should move past it. You can't change what happened in the past, just how you are now, and it's not fair to you now. You can be upset, it's fine.



  • @us-poet yes, you are right but I think I need to just keep cool and keep on trying and whatever happens, happens. It takes two to make a relationship work. I am not going to stop trying... I am a fighter.


 

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