Just pm me your # to play

"We are just sims 5 for god"

If you give a mouse a cookie,
He will bring his rodent friends and infest your house.

   Moral of the story don't trust any fucking mice.

Lawer: anything you say can and will be held against you
Kid: titties!
Lawer: (under breath) fuck he's good

Ribbed condoms taste nothing like ribs

Dear FBI agent,

I really appreciate you for dealing with my search history
Sincerely, sheriff

Once upon a midnight dreary, While I porn surfed, weak and weary. Once many a strange and spurious site full of hot xxx galore. While i clicked my favorite bookmark, suddenly there came a warning. And my heart was full of mourning, mourning for my dear amour. 'Tis not possible' I muttered ' give me back my free hardcore' Quothe the server... "404"

Are handjobs given by a girl who speaks sign language considered blowjobs?

Queue is just Q with 4 silent letters

If smart water is so smart why is it trapped in a bottle?