Best posts made by sarah_the_magpie

all mammals, regardless of size, take an average of 21 seconds to empty their bladder

@James-C-137
chill out lmao, they're just meaningless internet points

@Bill-Dhivid
that's so sweet. your response should be:

roses are red
bills are due
i'm not gonna pay them
yabba dabba doo~

@Happy_Pills
Hello Dylan, my name is John Smith. Sarah gave me the password to this account and I'm also trying to figure out how all this works. Perhaps we could assist each other?

@NoroTorVerse
i think that life is a mixture of dreams and nightmares.
of course, the sad thing is that you can wake up from a nightmare, but if your life has turned into a nightmare, you can't just wake up and make it all go away :(

@Lurker

@TagC
our meme princess has left for greener pastures :/

@Sij
a cyanide tablet should do the trick ;)
why are you asking tho sij? isn't morbid obesity going to end up killing you soon anyways?

@Tomáš-Karban
i agree, learning about ancient cultures & mythology can be very very fascinating. i was a real history nerd as a kid, so i totally get why you're so thrilled.

also, "the hobbit" is a great book! imho it's tolkien's best work :)))

@LickWeed33
i don't pity them at all, spammers are extremely annoying. you've got to whack them with your banhammer, ashy~

@अस-म-33

@Ladydoall30
i can't really say that i've traveled around the world much. as far as different countries go, i've been to canada, mexico and france.

i have plans to travel a lot in the future tho, there are many-many places i need to see~

@Lurker
you know it! also c'mon, you should post your pornhub account rep next, it's way more than 15K~

@RussianBlue
titanic was a great ice breaker

@Bela-Hella
have a great one @Bela-Hella! here's a snowman for good luck: ⛄️

@SHUSH
i would have lunch with ted bundy~

@mozy420 took my virginity :)))

there are dozens of funny people here, but my top choices would be @TheRisingSun, @Jesssssss, @enton, @Eye and @Scottish

@inti

uh oh

wait... did i get 60 because i answered "yes" to throwing eggs at cars & other people?
because that's something i've done more than once lmao

@Matt_Aranha
yes. please call in your crew :)