20 minutes early. Scope out the place, access the situation, plan several escape routes.

Still have sex. Lots of stuff is banned for foolish reasons

We have more stuff to shave

I think as sentences go, this one is desperately lacking

Turn your alarm clock off

Been there, done that. 3 times

Invisible. Flying is like riding a motorcycle. You end up eating a lot of bugs

Depends on what they're doing online.

@madirish first time I was 6. At the beach, rip tide pulled me out and I drown. Only thing that saved me was I was with my friend and her dad, a firefighter. He knew cpr before it became common for the public to know it. Second time I was 18 and on an operating table. My heart stopped and they couldn't get it going again. They called it and suddenly my heart started again, (I'm a bit contrary). Last time I was 37 and a blood vessel in my head burst. That time I told them I was going to go. Took them almost 15 minutes to convince me to come back. Got 6 more lives left

You just have to learn enough of each to function in the real world.

I want to fence in my yard and foster senior cats and dogs from shelters. So they'll have a comfortable, safe home to live out their last days.

Here's to hoping this new year brings you all you deserve.

I actually don't give a shit either way. Everyone can think I'm a horrible person for all I care

You just have to learn enough of each to function in the real world.

I think as sentences go, this one is desperately lacking

most people on the internet are married and single. just depends on what site they're on at the moment

@madirish first time I was 6. At the beach, rip tide pulled me out and I drown. Only thing that saved me was I was with my friend and her dad, a firefighter. He knew cpr before it became common for the public to know it. Second time I was 18 and on an operating table. My heart stopped and they couldn't get it going again. They called it and suddenly my heart started again, (I'm a bit contrary). Last time I was 37 and a blood vessel in my head burst. That time I told them I was going to go. Took them almost 15 minutes to convince me to come back. Got 6 more lives left

10 pounds a week is an extreme amount. If you lose that much for a few months, once you hit your target weight, you'll bounce back up in no time. Lose slow and steady. 4-5 a month. I know, it seems like it will take forever, but your body won't go into famine mode if you lose slowly.

He used to live at my house. His name was Jerry

A selfless act