Over 30yo males, over 20yo females

[Curiosity]

Hi all, I need to talk. Some with sense of humour, others that are depressed, people of all walks, all characters. Laugh, cry, live but most of all laugh. I'll start... Hi, I'm curious to know something happy or sad about YOU! Les Go Something about me. He's older and he still cheats. My choice of happy n sad.

[Saam k]

@curiosity HI

[Curiosity]

@saam-k hi, sorry in not replying earlier. I have nil experience with this site. #Newbie so, what's happening in your corner of the world?

[DayShifter]

@curiosity Hi there, what do you want to talk about?
I chat all kinds a rubbish lol
Welcome to the site, it's not a bad place to be to meet many a random folk hehehe
From the cheeky to the down right rude, and from the lowest depths of despair to the highest peeks of happiness ... it's all here

[Curiosity]

@shaun-durwin hi, so I was really wanting to talk about how my relationship is really rubbish! I came here for a different view and a different opinion, do you know much about a "kept" woman? Cos that's basically where I've come to realise where I am...

[DayShifter]

@curiosity
Hmmm, to be honest I don’t know much about that situation. I chose a long time ago to be single because of a few, let’s say not so great relationships.
One of them I was kind of expected to do everything. It wasn’t always like that, but over the years it became more apparent.
How did you come to realise your circumstances? Is it something your happy with? Or would you prefer to be more independent?

[Curiosity]

@Shaun-Durwin in my mind I build myself up and think I can handle this life style. Realistically, I can't. Its such a emotional rollercoaster. I hate losing a part of me every time, but because I've been faithful for so long, its so hard to move on. 5-6years on/off and never once my foot left my own backyard. His did, and still does, but I stand by him. What is that? And I'd love to feel more empowered then lonely. Or scared. Because in the end, he makes everything better. He definitely broke my will power to be independent, I definitely need that back though. I realised when I let my friend know, she told me I was a "kept" woman, and then it hit me. He broke all my walls and made me vulnerable. How do you do it? And what made you want to be single?

[Curiosity]

@Shaun-Durwin oh my! Took me that long to reply lol. Sorry. I had to think about that one real hard haha

[DayShifter]

@curiosity Hey, don't worry about how long it took to reply lol... thats no problem.
I have been there where everything kind of stays the same, so much that change seems to difficult. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that your situation should change, I would be very short sighted to even come close to suggesting that from what you have said thus far.
I have always been lead t believe that if a relationship is to thrive and grow it must be treated similar to a plant or a tree. If your place the seed to close to other seed's then it will not grow to its full potential. In order to achieve this the seed needs space so it does not suffocate as it grows, room for the roots to spread so it can thrive.
Independence can be a scary thing, but like all things we are unsure of, it's the fear of the unknown that prevents us from making changes. This fear is the worst of all because it's our own mind that plays tricks on us, over estimates the realities of what might actually be.
For me, my longest relationship was really good until my son came along (the apple of my eye). If it wasn't for him then I would feel that the 6 years we were together were a waste of time. Through the time we had we both worked, but when my son came along my ex still wanted to go out, have the party life, do the things that singles do, with the same cares as singles. She (as far as I know) was never unfaithful, but she leaned more towards her friends than her family. As a result I would stay home (which I didn't mind). Over the years from his birth it moved from me working and baby sitting to me working, baby sitting and cooking... then eventually cleaning the home was added to my list of chores.
My next longer relationship post this one started online. We met face to face a few times due to some of our commitments, but predominantly online. My partner was a nice woman and we got on really well. The thing was, we lived in different cities and this itself caused a huge strain on the relationship. The long and short of this one was when the relationship started impacting on my children's lives and started coming through in their personality's it was no longer about me. So I had to make a change. The relationship ended after almost 3'5 years.
I had some short relationships after that, but I had already decided that me and mine were the important things in my life, as a result new relationships just weren't the same, and to be real about it .... I ain't getting any younger lol
My kids are all grown up, so I don't need to think of them like I had to in the past, but I have become so used to being on my own I don't really feel that I will find someone that would be right for me.
I'm happy in my little self contained life, my little routines and my personal freedom yes I do miss the connection to someone close, the warm cuddles at night time.... but I always question, even now ....
Is it worth it???
Like you, I hate the rebuilding... the time wasted... the things and friends lost...
So I stay single. I stay free.
Now I must apologize for the delay in my reply.
If you ever want to chat, my direct messages are always open and I don't do the sordid things of the younger peeps (nudes and that rubbish).... so feel free when you want.

[DayShifter]

@curiosity oh yea , sorry for the essay lol

[Curiosity]

@shaun-durwin wow!!! Thank you

[Iservejustice]

IM 15...am I eligible enough to answer?