Im bored and having a bad day... someone want to talk? : ) about.. i dont know... everything?

I have tried everything but... this just gets worst!! I knew i this will happen but NOT LIKE THIS
Its like something horrible inside my head...
I some time ago i talked about this to a friend (the person who i like and i tell everything) but she just thought it was a joke.. and I DONT KNOW WHAT THINK NOW
I cant with this, i fel like i just want to die to end this
AND I DONT KNOW WHAT IS THIS FEELING
I dont know if its fear, deapair... Or what the hell is
And i still crying for no reason... HOW DO I END THIS?!?!?!?!

Whyyy the hell i want to cry!!?
I just feel like the worst person/thing on the earth... like. I have done horrible things to the others and... and...
I DONT KNOW WHY IS HAPPENING!!... or how to make it stop!!!

Please help..