Happens on every one On one chat site. It's quite annoying actually
Posts made by AlbeitDying
RE: We used to talk all the time but now look at us...
@Rissa_TheBest it all depends on the extent to which society has influenced your upbringing. Without succumbing to the freedom of openmindedness everything you see, everything you say, everything you will ever do are through the eyes mouths and body of whatever controls you. "with these eyes I am my father" goes the phrase I just invented (lol).
Your case of a relationship with the man and child isnt wrong IMO. however you would question it since the norm has taught you to do so. and at your very core you cant help it. (this is a general you)
RE: JUST WATCHED A MOVIE....
@mikeJB I don't think I missed the point, I think you missed the picture.
What did I do in your eyes? Defend the MALE abusers?!
No! I simply stated that people (and I will say this: female AND male for your benefit) ARE WEAK. they are. And the abusers are weak. The whole goddam universe is weak. And dont be so weak yourself so as to drive away any point that says otherwise.
Have a productive day.
RE: Have you ever been hurt by someone you loved so much?
@MillieBee yes. But it was the type of person that honestly was mentally slow which is not a problem it's just that they never realize they do anything wrong. You have to point out their mistake down to a T and even then they will argue that they did nothing.
Any way I took the toxic route and gave the broody silent treatment. We made up after I wrote a letter that explained everything (and three back to back pages covered everything and more).
But after a few more same incidents it hit me that we were not only different (which sometimes is what makes a friendship) but we could never see eye to eye because I was ahead of that person by milestones in awareness (not a brag, actually sucks) and that person could never change his/her way of thought because of fear.
Now we still chat occasionally but we drifted apart. Man. Sorry if I went off topic.
RE: JUST WATCHED A MOVIE....
@mikeJB I am worried that you are blinded by your own experiences that you fail to see what you are doing. Just to be clear this is not an attack, just some constructive criticism and a general opinion.
You see, I see A LOT of hatred in you which is ideally reserved for the serious fuck ups like (according to you) your father. And you take this platform to spread the word and make people more aware of the type of evil in the world, a pretence I find not generally wrong. But in response to your various statements:
Yes women are naive and so are men. Both are so immaculately weak to the greatest extend. But you should not take it that it is their fault. Why do you desire to discuss this topic? Because you have experienced it.
Marty in Shiloh only tried fighting the cruelties he discovered existed because they happened to fall in his lap, although they were in existence long before he decided to put up a fight.
Second, you think that the scumbags that riddle the earth to its core are worthless and all those beyond change deserve to die. Well, here I disagree. What they did or will do was and will be and is cruel, but we should learn from their example to be be better. Your hatred however extends to a degree that you (while not apparent) have developed a cruel nature of your own.
Have you thought that there are many forms of abuse not only physical? I'm sure you have. And do you realize that you in your many post (and who knows where else) are actually in some respect an abuser? Emotional abuser. Verbal abuser. I can't say for certain.
All I ask is that you vent in a way that doesnt scorch the viewers who look to you.
And again don't attack me because this is NOT an attack. Have a nice day.
RE: I feel I'm not enough and I'm sorry
@James-C-137 I'm sorry man that you feel this way. You hurt a lot as I've seen but that's ok. We all hurt. Some of us more that others. But you are very open an not many others are. Being open means you know what you feel and others however have a hard time realizing that they're in pain. You might not understand the pain, and maybe you don't want to because it's just to much. And one of these days it's more than possible that you simply become a shattered being, that you break down and give up.
Just know that these aren't the best times but they aren't the worst, and if you love something or someone or are trying to, keep going.
No ones asking you to shut the hell up and be a man and quit your whining and whatever. Just try and get things off your mind and chest by getting them onto something else. Figure it out and we'll support you.
And don't rush anything. Take these next days weeks months years one day week month year at a time in this life. Because I don't think you're ready to leave.
And I hope you think so too.
All The Broken Sunrises _ by me #7 (of a series)
The parlour hearth radiated dutifully,
and the doctor divulged in the leaves of a novel,
whose cover hid from my view.
I wondered if they were good.
“What know you of modern writings?”
asked he, sudden and bare.
-It is clear, and I enjoy the fog of old.
-But meaning is dug from surface.
-Some surfaces have no ground.
-Do they float?
-They soar, doctor,
they soar so very high from being.
He stumbled into silence
(misquote is a fall),
pricked by the burrs of thought.
“This here is poetry of new.”
-Has it the simplicity of new?
but also the depth of uncharted waters.
-Of current fraction:
‘Always Almost Never’.
of Eironffilac, Acerriman*.
-Foreign, I see… Shall you narrate?
-Do you wish it?
-There is a possibility
-Then I’ll speak.
His throat then cleared, he read.
“Almost Always Never
“Sometimes mockingbirds sing
When they can’t even speak.
Sometimes hearts can be silent
When they cannot scream.
“Sometimes oceans pull back
What they can give no more.
Sometimes the stars above fade
When they cannot shine.
“Sometimes thought is a path
People take when they’re lost.
Sometimes a stone makes no spark
When it isn’t struck.
“Sometimes pain is a book
If its stories are songs.
Sometimes the firelight freezes
When it cannot burn.
“And always almost never
The end would be the start.
Sometimes we take forever
To see in the dark.”
He stopped. “Be it simple?”
He recognized my silence with notice.
that is too lenient a word.
Zomo hasn’t made his friends yet.
Life is too petty but so great.
And abundance of third I have not.
I mayn’t live twice, and not for the better.
Simply, I understand.
-How blind I’ve been for long,
ever and now.
RE: All The Broken Sunrises _ by me #6 (of a series)
@Harely-Quinn it's narrative poetry, harleen. Follow the tags to read from the beginning of you care to.
All The Broken Sunrises _ by me #6 (of a series)
My father’s mansion
had been built at the base of a hill.
Today I was at the summit
after dining on medication,
tackling the sheer size of earth
by the scrutiny of an eagle.
Beside me stood the doctor,
holding me in place
for I perched myself at the lip of a cliff,
and my condition
was notorious for a lack of balance.
I said, “What be the horizon?”
-Where heaven clashes with ground.
What find you of this battlefield?
-It is the edge
the farthest an eye can grasp.
To perceive ahead is to own Beyond:
to envision one’s plan as definite.
-What be Beyond?
-It is a sight inexistential
where future is inexistent.
The question was of the leaves of my mind,
a book the doctor skimmed.
“Do you see Beyond?” posed he.
-Nay. There is no Beyond for me.
The author drops bloodied to a knife in his spine.
The pen clatters from grip
and Death brandishes his body.
The story is no more.
It was past midnight
when this came clear to him.
The sun drew anchor
and rose from the ocean.
There was a flash as dawn broke.
“When does dawn break?”
I questioned weakly.
“How is majesty so brittle?”
-You hurt from supper
but you aren’t attested.
-I wish an answer.
-You wish meaning,
the one particle the universe
-I wish your answer
and that a vacuum has.
-But void is not devoid of greed.
-Though man breathes air
he does not guard it.
-You wish an answer?
-I wish an answer. Doctor, I need one.
He drew his mouth to a close
then opened it most scholarly.
“One breaks when incapable of mend.
To grow so majestic
is to break a little forth within.
That is my answer.
Squall! the question is met.”
-I thank you. You needn’t try but you do.
I am to die, doctor, my body fails me.
There isn’t hope for a broken dam,
the city of pearls shall flood.
-You are the plaintive stone from gut?
-I am his cries,
the one fictitious aspect without an elaborated end.
I brought the night for she heard ache.
All I am is ache.
She heard me but saw death.
We started down the hill
and soon penetrated the mansion.
“Hold on yet, child;
the rope isn’t fully frayed.”
-But far is the gate
and my head it is broken.
-Must you hurt so?
-If you knew pain, I’d be that fact.
So I must, if I wish –
though I don’t –
to light on.
-Sleep, child, sleep.
-But the day is of sun.
-But your bed is of hay.
-Will you keep watch?
-Forever till naught.
I fell to slumber
uttering the last quote of sunup.
“Why is it so cold?
Men, I am weary.”
All The Broken Sunrises _ by me #5 (of a series)
From midnight till daybreak
I slept by the flames of the place.
From first till last
the doctor watched me
still as the deadman’s pulse.
I was roused by the scent of herbs.
Into the hearth the doctor threw leaves
for a purpose I could only question.
“Woe begat woe.” he said,
perceiving my consciousness.
-Has the plant any
-None but the scent of mockery.
-It is as I presumed.
Why must you mock?
-Because I have the will.
Have you that to stop me?
-How will you calm thus?
-Is that thy best offer?
-It is my only one.
-That is pity,
and none more self-set irritates me.
Folly, I say.
Have the decency to try.
-I am dying, let me rest.
-That I cannot.
He threw in larger doses of herb
and the smoke stung my lungs.
“Do you not let mercy take lead?”
I sounded, desperate.
-I master the carriage.
-But the horse stands afoot.
-The whip is at hand.
-The rope has come loose.
-The blade hasn’t.
-The storm, shall it settle?
This stopped his work.
His eyes glittered in the hearth
as he smiled with voice.
“When do you read Maelstrom*?”
-You recognize the words?
-I do. ‘the storm, shall it settle?’
Please. When thence?
When I hadn’t known yet, years before.
I’d had the incentive.
I hadn’t the nail in bark.
-Has your memory retained part?
I felt less than driven to speak.
The Maelstrom verses were all
But The Bowl I knew as more than a variant.
It was my story.
He straightened in his chair
and I awaited the smoke to dissipate.
“The Bowl,” I began.
“I could bring the waters
And put them in a bowl.
I’d drop rain for starters, but
The bowl has broken.
“I could stir these waters,
Stir it all with a spoon.
But withnot a bowl to use
The ocean is still.
“I sighed and the sky said,
‘Whatever will you do?
This is quite the conundrum.
Shall the storm settle?’
“I thought the storm might not;
Its light is drenched in dark,
Thunder rages with light, and
I have not a bowl.
“I found a cup in mud;
I cleaned it in the sea.
But my spoon could not fit, and
I threw it away.
“In sand I saw a jar
Which was just like my bowl.
But a hermit lived there, and
It said, ‘Leave me be.’
“I was still searching when
A man came up to me.
‘Why d’you need a bowl,’ he asked,
‘when you’ve got the sea?’
“’A sea is not a bowl,
My bowl is far deeper.
This old spoon could fit inside,
And it shook the world.'”
Satisfied, he leaned back,
as he’d bent forward to listen.
“What does it signify to you?
-It is the quake
-shook my world.
Brought down lives and sprung anew.
The tremors are of pen, the left of paper.
These are my lines.
The grandfather clock struck two
and the companioned DONG!
reverberated throughout the environs.
“The new day has come.”
-The past child needs rest.
-If you must then sleep.
I will keep watch.
-I think the storm shall.