Why I reject so many on here...

[Feldoh]

Hello fellow strangers. I want to tell you today, why so many have been rejected by me. Don't be offended if you are like these type of people! Instead, learn from their mistake.
When I chat with random people here, most of them are horny guys. First of all, no one wants a desperate guy. A desperate guy is not a sexy thing. The guy is desperate because he is not successful, which is why the guy show many signs for being desperate. For instance, the guy would insist on asking "M or F" no matter what I say, he tries to rail road me into a series of boring questions:

1. M or F / ASL
2. Age
3. From

You get the idea...
Sometimes they would ask just one of these questions, and then later on would ask for the rest. I remember a while back there were these type of guys who would try to not be like the rest and instead insist on asking my name. They would discover whether I am male or female using my name, which is why they were insisting every time on asking name.
Don't get me wrong, striving for relationship is not a bad thing. It's just that it's not a good strategy to behave like these guys.

On the next post I may give you some tips on how to actually talk to the girls here.

[TheRisingSun]

@Feldoh
I agree, people shouldn't have to ask for ASL.
Everyone should have their ASL in copy paste and it should be the first thing that appears in chat.

It's called introducing yourself on a textbased chatsite

What would you do in real life? Just walk up to ANY person and start a convo? I don't think so. You make your choice on who you walk up to based on their sex, age and looks. It's always the first criteria.

You probably sit there, being silent, untill someone asks for your ASL so you can judge them based on solely that question because you fail to introduce yourself properly, and skip them. No doubt you have missed out on meeting nice people 🤷.

I used to chat in the ninetees, ASL was the most normal first thing to ask for or share.
Some of those ASL assholes are still friends to this day.

These days people are so difficult about everything. It's their way or the highway, good luck with that, lady.

[Feldoh]

@TagC I don't mind that people try to flirt with me. I don't even mind the people here honestly, I just say it's silly to try this way - you see?

[Teg]

Okay you have a point there. Anyway, many guys here are attracted to pfp so they've just assumed you're the hot girl there and tryna have some chat with ya. It's reverse psychology

[sarah_the_magpie]

@Feldoh
it's always a good idea to call out rude & pervy people. i do have to agree with @Matt_Aranha tho, it's not really a wise idea to give these kinds of people tips on how to be more successful at messaging girls. it's better not to waste your time on them, just block & ignore :D

[Teg]

Lol catfish

[Feldoh]

@leo21 Good to hear you found some use in that

[Feldoh]

@TagC Why should I try to keep flirting people away, if they are interesting and not "M or F" guys?

[Teg]

@Feldoh do u have a bf?

[Matt_Aranha]

@Feldoh I get where you're coming from, but at the same time I've always been a little wary of teaching people who are already disposed to behave in a certain way "better" ways to attract and talk to others. Otherwise the agenda will always remain there, manners will not be sincere and become simply a means to an end (away)... I would rather address the fundamentals and encourage a stronger culture of respect before giving such people the tools to communicate and approach the people they wish to flirt/have fun with.

[Feldoh]

@Matt_Aranha I am not saying these people are "bad" or with "bad manners". I am just suggesting these people another strategy that may provide them more fun and maybe even a relationship that they strive for. These people are not having fun usually and rarely have any success. At the same time they don't try another approaches. Which is why I point it out and say, that maybe they should try another way.

[Teg]

@Feldoh just wanna have a litte chat tbh.This site is kinda boring

[Teg]

@Feldoh XD this is funny, like i've said I just wanna have a little chat cause this site is too boring

[Matt_Aranha]

@sarah_the_magpie Thank you Sarah, appreciated as always 👍

[sarah_the_magpie]

@Feldoh
uh.. tolerant? i mean yeah, i'm definitely not going to try to stop you from doing what you want to do, but just remember to be careful :)

[Feldoh]

@sarah_the_magpie Thanks for understanding. I really hate when people get judged. I like to say no villain sees themselves as the villain. People need to see from the point of view of the villain sometimes. Even the most pervy douchebag has a reason for being this way. Maybe he has a social problem? Maybe he doesn't know better? That is why we should be tolerant towards even the lowest and darkest.

[Matt_Aranha]

@Feldoh said in Why I reject so many on here...:

@sarah_the_magpie I think its a great idea, instead of ignoring the pervy guys I think we should try to understand them and help them to become better people. I think that is called tolerance. At least I believe we should be tolerant to these guys.

I have to disagree. Tolerance is by definition putting up with unacceptable or bothersome things. The kinds of guys who are firing "M or F" at every new first contact they make are almost invariably disposed to harassment when they meet a girl/woman who does not want to play their game. Both as a small online community and as a wider society we cannot allow that. It just isn't a polite way of introducing yourself; I always say if you wouldn't speak to somebody that way face to face in the street, don't do it online. That is especially true for introductions.

I am all for a positive change of attitudes and would actively encourage that, but when you start telling these people how to have more successful interactions with their targets you are not rehabilitating them - you become an accessory/enabler.

[Matt_Aranha]

@Feldoh These are wise words. Just, please be careful. That is all I hope for.

[Feldoh]

@Matt_Aranha Thank you for the good discussion, I will be careful!

[Matt_Aranha]

@Feldoh I appreciate your intentions; I sincerely wish you luck and hope good comes of it.