Hello all,
Merry Christmas!
I could really use some support with this one.
My husband and I have always shared the tradition of giving each other gifts at Christmas. This year he surprises me by not giving me anything after I wrapped his presents and asked him to come into the room to get them.
He then explains that he bought new kitchen appliances for me and this is why he had nothing for me for Christmas. He never explained this two months ago when the appliances were purchased. Nor did he mention that he didn't want to exchange gifts this year.
I have been doing so much for him. I feel that he has completely ruined our Christmas.
I don't want to bother anybody with this today since it's Christmas so I found this chat here and I'm hoping somebody can give me their thoughts.
He revealed to me that he wanted credit for paying for the appliances.
I should add that I have been on the phone for hours with the store that we purchased the appliances from since we were having so many problems with our order. I've been on the phone also with the manufacturer of the appliances. I have managed to get us a number of discounts do to my hard work.
Basically, to have him break this tradition of gift-giving is very hard for me. I'm not a materialistic person. It's just about the gesture. It's about saying " you matter to me". For him to strike out in a passive aggressive way on Christmas is extremely painful to deal with.
By the way, we had agreed earlier that we would wait to exchange gifts. At that point I took the wrapped packages back. But since then I feel that I just want to return the items and nevermind exchanging anything. I later told him that I don't want you do any gifts with him this year. So that will be the first time in 29 years of marriage.
He has demonstrated passive aggressive behavior previously. And it's never easy to deal with. We've dealt with a lot of loss over the last year, and now this.
Considering a divorce at this point. There is a lot of history to this relationship. His behaviors have done a lot of damage to my trust. I could go on but will end here. Thank you in advance for any and all replies, providing they are supportive.