Please someone help me

@Oliver-Jason it's so sad, he posted this a month ago and no one replied, i hope he is doing ok now

i legitimately loves her, i mean just too much.
From the time i fell in love with her, mostly the every thought i had was that it would hurt so much when she will leave me, the pain i would go through and stuff. And i was confident about it that, that shit is going to happen, the point in which i will give up on love. The pain and all left me shaking before i proposed you.
But the day i did asked her out and got rejected, i felt nothing, i just felt nothing, not a single tear in my eyes. Not even a heartache, just blank as stone. I did asked for reason but that didn't make me feel a bit. More of i felt relieved as the thought passed over now, i wont have shitty thought about her leaving now. Then just idk when but my eyes got shut and i slept one of the most comfortable sleep ever.
The next day, blank. I thought there would be some after effects but no. And on that day she said she won't tell me a bit of urself again and then our conversation got dead. We never talked like before, but still i was blank. I totally assumed she just left me. And i was ok about it. It that point she was just gone from my life. Everything was gone. I never felt hunger again, i never felt sleepy again, i never felt a need of anything, youtube was boring, i was not able to listen to music, it just felt like some annoying sound just banging on my ears. Every day was just same. In between my dad took away my phone and tab, i was ok. My room got locked for days, i was ok. I was just living, pushing everyday. The only thing i remember was waking up really early and sleeping really late which too i could not sleep, i just used to force myself to sleep at 4 am or 5 am just to wake up at 7am or 8 am. Never felt hunger, only ate when my mom forced me to. Everyday when i meet people, i am ok with them, just have a laughing time with them and then getting lost a thoughts and complete forgetting why i was laughing after a few mins. I used to watch horror shit every night. Lights off, full volume, but nothing really scared me, even jumpscares were ok. I just don't know how i am lived these days. I am just dead inside. I dont have people around me either. I am just a lonely guy riding his boat alone. No, no cares in my life at least in real life. I just been already said and never had a shoulder to cry on, had once but she just left. No i am not going to attempt suicide but does my life really matter at this point. Idk anymore, i am just pushing to live next day.

i legitimately loves her, i mean just too much.
From the time i fell in love with her, mostly the every thought i had was that it would hurt so much when she will leave me, the pain i would go through and stuff. And i was confident about it that, that shit is going to happen, the point in which i will give up on love. The pain and all left me shaking before i proposed her.
But the day i did asked her out and got rejected, i felt nothing, i just felt nothing, not a single tear in my eyes. Not even a heartache, just blank as stone. I did asked for reason but that didn't make me feel a bit. More of i felt relieved as the thought passed over now, i wont have shitty thought about her leaving now. Then just idk when but my eyes got shut and i slept one of the most comfortable sleep ever.
The next day, blank. I thought there would be some after effects but no. And on that day she said she won't tell me a bit of urself again and then our conversation got dead. We never talked like before, but still i was blank. I totally assumed she just left me. And i was ok about it. It that point she was just gone from my life. Everything was gone. I never felt hunger again, i never felt sleepy again, i never felt a need of anything, youtube was boring, i was not able to listen to music, it just felt like some annoying sound just banging on my ears. Every day was just same. In between my dad took away my phone and tab, i was ok. My room got locked for days, i was ok. I was just living, pushing everyday. The only thing i remember was waking up really early and sleeping really late which too i could not sleep, i just used to force myself to sleep at 4 am or 5 am just to wake up at 7am or 8 am. Never felt hunger, only ate when my mom forced me to. Everyday when i meet people, i am ok with them, just have a laughing time with them and then getting lost a thoughts and complete forgetting why i was laughing after a few mins. I used to watch horror shit every night. Lights off, full volume, but nothing really scared me, even jumpscares were ok. I just don't know how i am lived these days. I am just dead inside. I dont have people around me either. I am just a lonely guy riding his boat alone. No, no cares in my life at least in real life. I just been already said and never had a shoulder to cry on, had once but she just left. No i am not going to attempt suicide but does my life really matter at this point. Idk anymore, i am just pushing to live next day.

Hey dude please don't loss hope, i will help u. We can discuss things out if ucwant to

@Mia-x no Mia it's not like that. The people who like to end their life feels left alone. They know they have no value left in this world. They know people don't really care if they are dead or alive. Sure it will have impact on our families but like if you dont really matter to ur family members, living for them is no point. Even if someone love me from the inside and i have no clue about it then what's the point? Even if that person loves you, you never really felt being loved. It just a really messy stuff. The thing is they r not selfish, they are self caring, they just wanted to get reliefed by their long lasting pain and depression, they don't want to carry a brokenheart or feeling heavy all the time. And they feel this way bcuz of all the selfish people around. Suicide is the quickest way to end one's misiries. But it's a harsh decision to take. Suicide should be last possible thought which should come in ones mind. If you r attempting suicide knowing that people care about them and they having value, are real stupid and selfish people then. They don't deserve it then. Suicide is the option when there is nothing left for you and inside you. When u are dead from ur feelings, when you are dead from inside. It's for those people who are at a point where their inside is already dead. I hope you got me. No i am not promoting suicide but it's just like explaining the point from my side of view.

I don't even know what r u Talkin bout

@pardis2001 thanks a lot, i really appreciate it, i would like to talk

@sazz hey buddy, give us details about ur conditions and ur situation. Believe me or not i am going through same. I might be able to help you out. DM me maybe.

Haha sure

@Oliver-Jason it's so sad, he posted this a month ago and no one replied, i hope he is doing ok now

Hey dude please don't loss hope, i will help u. We can discuss things out if ucwant to

@pardis2001 haha pardis love i will never let you down, well you already know that !!!

I don't even know what r u Talkin bout

I haven't watched any of those movies u have mentioned but i will recommend u some anyways.

1. Interstellar
2. John wick 1/2/3
3. Deadpool 1/2
4. Life of pi
5. Avengers
6. Your name. ( It's an anime movie but the best so far)
7. Gravity
   I hope u like my recommendations, they r not much but ok. Have a nice day ahead.

@Indrid-Cold yeh maybe time will heal. Idk man, let's just wait and watch.

@Yuuu yeh maybe it would be cool, if i felt it
Look buddy, ik what i am saying, no one cares, as far as u say of my mom or dad, they just want to get rid of me. Never love me, ok even if they do, but what's the point if i never felt being loved. Anyways, i once heard my dad talking to my mom that he doesn't love me anymore as i am scoring bad at school. That might be enough ig to prove u.
Yeh it's fun not being able to feel

i legitimately loves her, i mean just too much.
From the time i fell in love with her, mostly the every thought i had was that it would hurt so much when she will leave me, the pain i would go through and stuff. And i was confident about it that, that shit is going to happen, the point in which i will give up on love. The pain and all left me shaking before i proposed her.
But the day i did asked her out and got rejected, i felt nothing, i just felt nothing, not a single tear in my eyes. Not even a heartache, just blank as stone. I did asked for reason but that didn't make me feel a bit. More of i felt relieved as the thought passed over now, i wont have shitty thought about her leaving now. Then just idk when but my eyes got shut and i slept one of the most comfortable sleep ever.
The next day, blank. I thought there would be some after effects but no. And on that day she said she won't tell me a bit of urself again and then our conversation got dead. We never talked like before, but still i was blank. I totally assumed she just left me. And i was ok about it. It that point she was just gone from my life. Everything was gone. I never felt hunger again, i never felt sleepy again, i never felt a need of anything, youtube was boring, i was not able to listen to music, it just felt like some annoying sound just banging on my ears. Every day was just same. In between my dad took away my phone and tab, i was ok. My room got locked for days, i was ok. I was just living, pushing everyday. The only thing i remember was waking up really early and sleeping really late which too i could not sleep, i just used to force myself to sleep at 4 am or 5 am just to wake up at 7am or 8 am. Never felt hunger, only ate when my mom forced me to. Everyday when i meet people, i am ok with them, just have a laughing time with them and then getting lost a thoughts and complete forgetting why i was laughing after a few mins. I used to watch horror shit every night. Lights off, full volume, but nothing really scared me, even jumpscares were ok. I just don't know how i am lived these days. I am just dead inside. I dont have people around me either. I am just a lonely guy riding his boat alone. No, no cares in my life at least in real life. I just been already said and never had a shoulder to cry on, had once but she just left. No i am not going to attempt suicide but does my life really matter at this point. Idk anymore, i am just pushing to live next day.

i legitimately loves her, i mean just too much.
From the time i fell in love with her, mostly the every thought i had was that it would hurt so much when she will leave me, the pain i would go through and stuff. And i was confident about it that, that shit is going to happen, the point in which i will give up on love. The pain and all left me shaking before i proposed you.
But the day i did asked her out and got rejected, i felt nothing, i just felt nothing, not a single tear in my eyes. Not even a heartache, just blank as stone. I did asked for reason but that didn't make me feel a bit. More of i felt relieved as the thought passed over now, i wont have shitty thought about her leaving now. Then just idk when but my eyes got shut and i slept one of the most comfortable sleep ever.
The next day, blank. I thought there would be some after effects but no. And on that day she said she won't tell me a bit of urself again and then our conversation got dead. We never talked like before, but still i was blank. I totally assumed she just left me. And i was ok about it. It that point she was just gone from my life. Everything was gone. I never felt hunger again, i never felt sleepy again, i never felt a need of anything, youtube was boring, i was not able to listen to music, it just felt like some annoying sound just banging on my ears. Every day was just same. In between my dad took away my phone and tab, i was ok. My room got locked for days, i was ok. I was just living, pushing everyday. The only thing i remember was waking up really early and sleeping really late which too i could not sleep, i just used to force myself to sleep at 4 am or 5 am just to wake up at 7am or 8 am. Never felt hunger, only ate when my mom forced me to. Everyday when i meet people, i am ok with them, just have a laughing time with them and then getting lost a thoughts and complete forgetting why i was laughing after a few mins. I used to watch horror shit every night. Lights off, full volume, but nothing really scared me, even jumpscares were ok. I just don't know how i am lived these days. I am just dead inside. I dont have people around me either. I am just a lonely guy riding his boat alone. No, no cares in my life at least in real life. I just been already said and never had a shoulder to cry on, had once but she just left. No i am not going to attempt suicide but does my life really matter at this point. Idk anymore, i am just pushing to live next day.

@pardis2001