Posts made by LEX1S LEW

Ok, this is my first time sharing anything like this but, I just need someone to talk to. In short, I just graduated high school and while in high school I met this really cute boy. But he didn't like me at all, he would sometimes walk all over me, ignore me, and treat me as if I had the plague sometimes. The problem is, I liked this boy for three years and it hurts like hell. One because I already had a low self-esteem (12 years of bullying didn't help that at all). And two, every guy I met so far has either ignored me or push me away based on my looks which just makes me feel worse about my self. It sucks that Dustin didn't seem to have one care about me at all. For the longest time I didn't 100% care about guys but until 10th grade I just liked him. I tried asking him out once, but all he did was ignore me. And if I tried to talk to him he would listen for like three seconds but then walk away. The one time I got close to any kind of "real" answer level is when I asked him about something and then he replied with a half-assed answer to "Go on Christian mingle". I don't know why I found this one guy so nice ( and to like him for three years, this year in counting). Maybe it was his looks, or maybe it was the thought that maybe he's just a bad guy because he's had a shitty life and maybe I could just make it better or make him feel better. Maybe less alone, or maybe be someone he could talk too. I dunno, the point that I am trying to get at is that my heart is broken. I don't know how to fix it or get over it 100%, and that will I ever find a guy who likes me? Or was I doomed since day one to be alone? (Tbh I want to punch the guy sometimes for making me feel like such shit and treated poorly when I really tried to get somewhere).