Posts made by joyandwhimsy

i guess the best way is to trick myself into being happy. if i think abt it, the more i stay sad like this, the more i do nothing. and when im sad and doing nothing, im useless. im not serving anyone. so, i should just shut up and slap a smile on and call it good. besides, no one wants to sit with these emotions bc it will make them uncomfortable to be around me! sorry for inconveniencing you!! hehe ^u^

im just feeling extremely empty and sad. i need to stop feeling this way. how to become happy in an instant? like within 5 minutes?

not sure why, but i find myself not eating all day? its been weeks now, so far, i dont feel any effects from it, but i know its not good im not eating either. i just dont feel like eating? sometimes i do feel hungry, but i cant bring myself to get food. dont get me wrong, i love food! i love eating food! im pretty sure im not depressed or have an eating disorder. idk whats wrong w me these days lol

new here. if anyone is willing to listen & share insight, i would appreciate it. im in college now. my parents are starting to pressure me to get a boyfriend & get married & have children. but the problem is, i dont see myself in a relationship in the future & ive never been interested in it. it doesnt help that im not the most gender conforming person there is in terms of my presentation. these days, i hear my relatives gossip & my parents express disappointment that im not feminine, have a boyfriend, passion for nursing unlike their family friends. unfortunately, ive always been this way. i honestly dont want to live anymore at this rate bc my very existence disgusts my family. any genuine tips on forcing myself to conform to their idealized idea of me? ive already disappointed them enough. i wish to be normal.

if anyone got this far, i truly thank you for taking the time to read this, i wish u a lovely day.