You confused and boggled you consider you are being paranoid ?? I can say you are misinterpreting to yourself about friend, alo so naive to belive in you thought without understanding the deeper meaning of friend

Ask yourself what friend means for you??
A fellow will be there with you in your good and bad times without being judgemental about your actions, and consider you, take you as you are ..always try to help without being selfish, will not hesitate to confronts your stupid and wrong doings..
So now question is do you have any one around you with this quality?? Yeah it's friend for ever i guess ??