Hi all
I am having bad today. I received abusing messages from my landlord. He is alcoholic and smoking cannabis. i am clean person and I am trying to be nice to him. I am cleaning my room weekly I am cleaning bathroom (only I), I am cleaning floor in hole house. He never sees all these staff just complaining if I do something wrong.
I also had supervision with my team leader yesterday. She told me that some my patient complained about me. I have breached confidentiality. It was verbal message to patient mobile phone. I cannot prove otherwise. This is my contract job and expire in September. i am looking for new job. i had some very good job interviews. However, my Team leader is my referee.
The worst part is...
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Nobody knew I was broken; people just assumed I was an energetic, happy, silly girl but really I was dying inside like, I didn’t even know how to talk about it because it just sounded like I was complaining about the stupidest shit. And the guilt I was feeling for even thinking that I deserved a happier life. Idk. I was only 13 and I knew that I was gonna have to face a lot of negative layers in my life.
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@banxs ok listen. Lots of us face mental pressure. No one is strong enough to keep it inside . This is 3hy we have friends and family. You should always say what you feel. Dont be shy or worried. Whats it gonna do? It wont hurt more if you let it out once. Its hard but it fèels good afterwards
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@Alireza-iran I'm 22 now and I’m happier than ever, thanks for your pep talk haha it was sweet. I wrote this a while ago it's just I wanted to share it because it makes up a part of who I am and who I grew to be. No worries, I'm very open and honest, I’m not afraid of speaking up it's just that when I was young, people didn't take me seriously. But now that I'm older, everything is different. I’ve changed.
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@banxs if only i could say it matters for me. People still see me as i was even now that im 27 and grown up . Now im an open person too but still there are lots of things no one knows about.all that matters is havung someone that actually cares what you are going through in your head. And thank god i have that. And im very happy about it
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@Alireza-iran I guess the most important lesson I’ve learned is that I have to take care of myself first. And I’m my own best friend before anyone else.
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@banxs thats true. But we always need other people in our lives too to share these moments with. Helps with the pain.