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    humanbean89

    @humanbean89

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    Age 37

    humanbean89 Unfollow Follow

    Best posts made by humanbean89

    • RE: For all the people that wanna commit suicide

      @kat_15

      Really? I wasn't loved by my "mother" she told me she liked my brothers better, and that she wished she had never adopted me. I tried to ask her for help with my anxiety and depression and all...and she laughed and said grow up. I currently live in what's basically an insane asylum, a residential program for people with mental illnesses. I'm just depressed. I don't need to be in this type of setting. She ruined my life. I can't trust anyone because of her breaking promises on a weekly basis. I'll believe it when I see it. Out of my 2 brothers and I, she only searched MY room. Why? Because she was my mother and was allowed to intrude. Not even my diary was safe. I only had privacy when I was in the bathroom. I never had friends over the house because she hated every person I liked. I never had a beanie baby or anything popular because she didn't want to waste money. I was bullied in school for not having those things. I told her about being bullied, and she laughed and said serves you right. I told her that I wanted to be a physical therapist or a social worker when I grew up because I wanted to help people. She told me that I was stupid and would never amount to anything. I was over 18, legally an adult and by law was allowed to give permission if I wanted her in my psych appointments and all. I tried to say no, but she'd push her way in and lie to the doctor and said she new me better than I did myself. She had one doctor wrapped around her finger and would kick me out of the room to talk to him privately. She convinced him that I was an alcoholic. I only drink a tiny bit at social gatherings. Because of her I have no life, no friends, no social life, no nothing. My own brothers don't know how to interact with me because of what she did to me. The main reason why I'm struggling to be here is that I now have a 2 year old niece who is giving me a bit of a reason to live. I still kind of with that my attempt in 2009 was successful. Then I'd never see how awful the country has become.

      posted in Discuss Anything
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: FUN FACT GUYS COME SEE

      Did they have the U.S. there too? I've been told to go back to my own country, that only white people belong here...when in fact they TOOK IT BY FORCE from the Native Americans...Everywhere in history, the white man has taken what's not theirs and ruined the beauty of the land and culture. Look at the whites calling the police on innocent African Americans. Most people I've met who aren't white aren't racist. They just hate the way they are treated by the spoiled white people who think they are better than everyone else in the world. Look at the current "president". Disgusting. Look at all of the news stories that have been popping up for the last decade or so. EVERYONE CAN BE RACIST. Just like everyone can be any religion. I'm not white. I'm Asian and I'm Jewish. Racist people everywhere need a good asswhooping. Or treated bad as they treat others. But sadly, even if they did get a taste of their own medicine, they'd run crying to their lawyer. I saw something that white people were upset that there were no "white lives matter movements." Really? How stupid can they be. In this country, you have the best life if you are white. And blonde ladies get the better and higher paying jobs according to an article I read. I think we need another biblical flood to cleanse the Earth of all the BS...sheesh.

      posted in Discuss Anything
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: WHY THE WORLD IS FLAT

      ...yeah and they never walked on the moon (my dad works for NASA and the government)...and the Holocaust is just propaganda (I'm Jewish and have visited the camps as well as knew someone) Elvis is partying with aliens, Tupac is in a bunker hiding, and every person on this earth has common sense...….NOT!!! Everything you read, especially online isn't always true. Check the facts people. That's how misinformation spreads and causes problems....Do ya people not know how to read? I mean I kind of understand not teaching cursive in school nymore, but reading and checking facts? Y'all never did book reports growin up?

      posted in Discuss Anything
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: Is CHEATING a mistake or a choice?

      @rendezvous
      Exactly. I was just about to say that.

      posted in Polls - Surveys - Votes
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: For all the people that wanna commit suicide

      @calisthenics

      what if you never really had anyone. no close friends or family. your own adoption papers from the orphanage literally say "after a short fling a baby was born and taken to xyz orphanage" I've never known "love" lust, yes. love no. everyone I tried to love or trust fucked me over multiple times.

      posted in Discuss Anything
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: Is CHEATING a mistake or a choice?

      Sometimes you are FORCED into it. I was blackmailed and threatened by a boss/former friend/authority figure who was married into a relationship I didn't want but I kind of had to deal with it because I was homeless and they were my housing for the time. It is both a choice because you CAN and SHOULD have the ability to say no, but also a mistake because of the aftermath it could possibly cause...

      posted in Polls - Surveys - Votes
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: Is CHEATING a mistake or a choice?

      @wtfjudith people don't care about others. especially in this country. Sex isn't sacred-like the way it used to be. And I know it wasn't consentual, but wasn't HE cheating though? His choice, and mistake...

      posted in Polls - Surveys - Votes
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: Is CHEATING a mistake or a choice?

      @wtfjudith said in Is CHEATING a mistake or a choice?:

      @humanbean89 said in Is CHEATING a mistake or a choice?:

      @wtfjudith people don't care about others. especially in this country. Sex isn't sacred-like the way it used to be. And I know it wasn't consentual, but wasn't HE cheating though? His choice, and mistake...

      He was cheating, yes. What’s even worse in this situation is that this wasn’t a consensual act.. I get that sex isn’t viewed the same way by everyone, but the thing remains that what he did was fucking wrong, to the wife he cheated on and to you 😕

      Thanks. I know...but I didn't want to be on the streets that winter...so.....yeah...

      posted in Polls - Surveys - Votes
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: If u could DELETE anything from EARTH, what would it be?

      ignorant people who think they know everything and how to solve the issues, but only are making the matters worse...politicians, bigots, arrogant people, people who try to start problems, especially online where you're anonymous...personally it gets darker, but mainly asses that are ruining society by not listening to others and valuing everyone regardless of race, background, political party, religion, gender, etc. I don't want a utopia per se, but I just wish there weren't as many asses here on this planet...

      posted in Internet is Beautiful
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: WULD YOU SMASH OR PASS ME?

      if you're les or bi i'd hit you up

      posted in Questions & Answers from Strangers
      humanbean89
      humanbean89

    Latest posts made by humanbean89

    • RE: For all the people that wanna commit suicide

      @kat_15

      well they're taking too damn long to show up. I've been waiting my whole life, and nobody fits that bill, unless they're a stalker hiding from me and secretly in love with me...and why didn't I get love as a child when my brothers did? was it because I'm not her biological kid? Why have I still not found a job. Why do most people tell me to grow up that mental illness is as fake as celebrities boobs? I could go on and on...

      posted in Discuss Anything
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: Is CHEATING a mistake or a choice?

      @wtfjudith mentally...sort of....physically...mostly....financially....fuck no... 😞

      posted in Polls - Surveys - Votes
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: How would you describe yourself in 4 words???

      useless, unloved, unwanted, ignored

      posted in Discuss Anything
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: Is CHEATING a mistake or a choice?

      @wtfjudith said in Is CHEATING a mistake or a choice?:

      @humanbean89 said in Is CHEATING a mistake or a choice?:

      @wtfjudith people don't care about others. especially in this country. Sex isn't sacred-like the way it used to be. And I know it wasn't consentual, but wasn't HE cheating though? His choice, and mistake...

      He was cheating, yes. What’s even worse in this situation is that this wasn’t a consensual act.. I get that sex isn’t viewed the same way by everyone, but the thing remains that what he did was fucking wrong, to the wife he cheated on and to you 😕

      Thanks. I know...but I didn't want to be on the streets that winter...so.....yeah...

      posted in Polls - Surveys - Votes
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: People looking for nudes

      do what my friend did. Say a pic of a cute person you saw online doing a google search or something was you and asked the people on the site to send pics...it worked a few times for him...lol I was surprised

      posted in Questions & Answers from Strangers
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: Is CHEATING a mistake or a choice?

      @wtfjudith people don't care about others. especially in this country. Sex isn't sacred-like the way it used to be. And I know it wasn't consentual, but wasn't HE cheating though? His choice, and mistake...

      posted in Polls - Surveys - Votes
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: Are you comfortable eating in public?

      of course. I masticate both in public and at home on a daily basis.

      (look it up you dorks if you don't know what it means)

      posted in Questions & Answers from Strangers
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: For all the people that wanna commit suicide

      @calisthenics

      ...not really...kinda annoyed me a bit. that's part of the usual you'll be ok crap I usually hear. It's tiring and stressful. Like hearing I'll get a job soon. How can you be so damn sure I am. People who don't have to worry about jobs, where to sleep, finding food, can't usually understand that they're hurting you by promising you in a way that you'll get a job soon. Honestly, I know that if I came into a fortune and could stop worrying about the basics, I'd be helping my depression be cured. To me, a stable job is a holy grail of sorts. When I was working, I was positive in life. Now that no one wants me, idgaf. I have supplies that I saved money for a while to jut disappear into the woods for good. I've been waiting too damn long for my life to turn around for the good. And like I said earlier, I AM trying to help myself, but it's worse than going up the steepest, iciest, challenging wall. NO ONE IS HELPING ME. NO FAMILY. NO FRIENDS. NO ONE. I'm basically going hungry on the streets with only someone giving me a temporary roof over my head. I have to leave at the beginning of July.

      posted in Discuss Anything
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: For all the people that wanna commit suicide

      @calisthenics

      I have been. I've been fighting to try and get ANY job. now they want you to be over qualified for the simplest jobs. Back when I was in school, all you needed to be a cashier at Target was a high school diploma...I've applied there many times...and nothing. I've applied to businesses that I have experience...and nothing...for almost 10 years I've been jobless, homeless, and SOL. It is hard to find money for food let alone happiness when nobody wants to help. I've gone to shelters in the past and they turned me away because people my age aren't homeless and jobless. She thought I was trying to steal from them. I want to go back to school, but I don't even have enough money for an application fee. I want to better my life, but society is making it pretty fucking hard to tread water. And once people hear I have depression and where I currently am staying, they treat me like shit. I am trying to fight the stigma of mental illness, but I am getting no help from anyone anywhere except the measly social security checks each month that don't really help.

      Fine. Keep petting our heads and saying "you'll get better soon. You'll get a job soon. It'll be better soon. Drink more water and eat healthy" if it'll make YOU feel better. But not actually helping hurts. Saying you understand someone's pain when you've never experienced it yourself hurts. Saying you'll be there no matter what and you aren't hurts. We need people to stfu and actually take the time to listen and not post all these self help crap posts online. We know what to do. We deal with it on a daily basis. Just because some famous celebrity died from suicide doesn't mean the topic is popular. IT IS ALWAYS HERE. Keep talking about it, no matter if some famous guy dies or if it was your friend. Putting it in the back of your mind 3 months after it's out of the news doesn't help. Be aware.

      posted in Discuss Anything
      humanbean89
      humanbean89
    • RE: For all the people that wanna commit suicide

      @humanbean89

      • meant than presume*
      posted in Discuss Anything
      humanbean89
      humanbean89