How do you figure out whom to trust?



  • How do you guys figure out whom to trust on the internet? Specifically on TWS? How do you do it IRL?
    Is it easy for you to trust someone? Or are you always scared that they'll hurt you or steal from you?



  • @pe7erpark3r

    I try to trust people until they prove me I shouldn't. What's the point of always play defensive? Yes, I get it, we shouldn't tell our life story to a stranger we met online or in the street but what I mean is... try to trust em until they prove they can't be trusted, if they don't ever break your trust then they'll never have to earn it, somehow 🤷
    I wouldn't approach anyone with ill intentions so I assume others wouldn't, I know that's not the case but that's how I see this subject! 😛



  • @pe7erpark3r When we meet people online such as on TWS we cannot know their true nature. We only know what they want to show us. We assume that's their character.
    My opinion is I can trust people if I know them for a long time, if I chat with them daily....
    N There r 18 people I consider as friends in the real life but with time and due to different situations I have gradually learnt that only 4 of them r my true friends...


  • Music Lovers

    @pe7erpark3r

    TRUST NO ONE OVER THE INTERNET, BUT YOURSELF
    But in real life its perfectly alright to be vulnerable. Go out in the world, talk to people. Many will deceive you into thinking that they are good people, so dont feel bad if they hurt you. You cant control how other people act, or the outcomes of the situation, all you can do in this social world is to go out and give your genuine self to others;
    as it says in the Bhagvat Gita;

    “Karm Karo, Fal ki Chinta mat Karo”

    Focus on the sure (actions), not on the unsure (results). Because if the results are not as per your expectations, pain is unavoidable. Never consider yourself to be the cause of the results, as results doesn't solely depend on your efforts. It depends on multiple factors, situation, and even other people who are involved

    • As for me;
      I conditionally TRUST PEOPLE.

  • Global Moderator

    @pe7erpark3r Trusting a person is not as easy as learning an ABC's or counting 123's may it be in real life or online.. Trust is a long time commitment to cherish so be careful who you trust ,make sure she/he is really trusthworthy.. How to figure it out? Your heart will say it so..
    Trusting someone without any doubt you finally get one of two results.

    1. a person in life
    2. a lesson in life


  • As I told many times here: "Every word can be a lie, every picture can be a fake". So it is better to be hidden under the mask. Anyway your thoughts are still reflects yourself, so it is still you under the mask. We can dig deeper to the question, who we are really.. Ehm.. The correct question would be, which mask is more real. That one, which you put on when you communicate with your family and friends in real life, or that one which you put on when you write here or on any other forum. But all of these masks are the part of you. You is you, do you trust to yourself?

    These thoughts reminds me a character of V.. (from V for Vendetta comics (and film))
    alt text
    The man, who lost his memory and under the mask implement a character of vengeance. It relates to question, who are we. Ourselfs as ourselfs, or our deeds make ourselfs.. You can forgot about whom you are, and become someone else.. But looks like it is the theme for another topic 🙂

    Returning to the question of trust. Sometimes you don't thins about circumstances, and allows to someone to look at the face which is hidden under the mask. "There is a face under the mask, but it isn't me" - as said a character, that I mentioned above. Everyone put on a mask, and everyone rise his own edges of trust with others..


  • Global Moderator

    @pe7erpark3r 🤔
    For me trust is something that is there if we realize or not.
    When you speak to anyone, open up about anything in your own life (does not matter if it is in the matrix or the real world) you are extending trust to that person ... the more you speak, the more the trust grows.
    If you were to meet people and be gaurded all of the time, the respondants will pick up on this and act accordingly.
    Some may decided that your own barriers are worth trying to break down, others would simply move on the the next potential friend or partner.
    The thing is, again matrix or real world, you can never tell if someone is genuine or fake! Of course in the real world we have more methods to determin the motives of those people......
    For me personally I take people as I find them, I don't listen to gossip and I make up my own mind.
    Just because some has caused a person pain or suffering, does not mean they will do the same to you
    As I have said many times before on this site, I am a believer in people and their good nature....
    some might call me stupid, other's may see an oppertunity .......
    I see it as faith ..... faith that most of us can at least get along



  • @Lurker said in How do you figure out whom to trust?:

    I try to trust people until they prove me I shouldn't.

    That is a good way of interacting with people, for it allows them to approach you without fear. I think I'm trying to act similar unless my subconscious makes me act otherwise... Not like we always have control over our impulses.

    I assume that your trust too is actually conditional? Like not giving your home address to just anybody...



  • @pe7erpark3r said in How do you figure out whom to trust?:

    I assume that your trust too is actually conditional? Like not giving your home address to just anybody...

    Exacly, I trust people enough to allow them to get to know me and believe in the things they say and their intentions, but the blind trust only comes with time!



  • @Lurker said in How do you figure out whom to trust?:

    Don't you think that giving away your adress to someone that you never meet is blind trust?

    No, that's not what I'd call trusting blindly. For me that is more, like trusting someone in death or life situations. If giving out my address was this dangerous, then I shouldn't have an address, I should be in hiding. Because IRL any shady person who walks up to my house sees the name on the tag, if you know what I mean.

    To me trusting blindly is really trusting someone, and letting him or her guide me on my way.



  • @Lurker said in How do you figure out whom to trust?:

    Exacly, I trust people enough to allow them to get to know me and believe in the things they say and their intentions, but the blind trust only comes with time!

    I don't think I am actually capable of trusting another person blindly.



  • I don't see how trust is an issue. If you've got sufficiently strong personality, a conman or a cat-fisher will find it too much hard work to try and entertain you prior to the scam.

    Of course, when it comes to the risk of some fickle girl genuinely falling in love with you and then breaking your heart, or vice versa, the whole thing becomes slightly more complex. Usually just fuse the axon receptors in your synapses with a hi-frequency dendrite emitter so your whole brain chemistry changes and you forget her.



  • @pe7erpark3r

    I DONT



  • @DIVYAM said in How do you figure out whom to trust?:

    @pe7erpark3r

    TRUST NO ONE OVER THE INTERNET, BUT YOURSELF

    Are you sure about that? Do you believe that the people who wouldn't deceive you in the real world, will deceive you in the virtual world? Do you think the fact of a (relative) anonymity brings out the worst in people, that you wouldn't see IRL?

    Focus on the sure (actions), not on the unsure (results). Because if the results are not as per your expectations, pain is unavoidable. Never consider yourself to be the cause of the results, as results doesn't solely depend on your efforts. It depends on multiple factors, situation, and even other people who are involved

    That is something I should tatoo on my body somewhere cause I just can't seem to bring myslelve to believe that it's not just me 😅

    • As for me;
      I conditionally TRUST PEOPLE.

    Yeah, that sounds reasonable.



  • @niks-niks said in How do you figure out whom to trust?:

    @pe7erpark3r When we meet people online such as on TWS we cannot know their true nature. We only know what they want to show us. We assume that's their character.

    That is a good point! It is harder to really "see" people over the internet, because it is much easier for them to hide parts of their character!

    My opinion is I can trust people if I know them for a long time, if I chat with them daily....

    Yeah, that allows you to see how they react from day to day with their different moods.

    N There r 18 people I consider as friends in the real life but with time and due to different situations I have gradually learnt that only 4 of them r my true friends...

    Well this is sad. You know what I tend to think? Those 14 people are probably pretty lonely, because who is not a true friend to 1 person is probably not to another either. However do you know the saying: "If you find even one true friend in this life you are truly lucky".



  • @pe7erpark3r said in How do you figure out whom to trust?:

    I don't think I am actually capable of trusting another person blindly.

    Don't you think that giving away your adress to someone that you never meet is blind trust?



  • @Belastic-Bomb said in How do you figure out whom to trust?:

    @pe7erpark3r Trusting a person is not as easy as learning an ABC's or counting 123's may it be in real life or online.. Trust is a long time commitment to cherish so be careful who you trust ,make sure she/he is really trusthworthy.. How to figure it out? Your heart will say it so..
    Trusting someone without any doubt you finally get one of two results.

    1. a person in life
    2. a lesson in life

    That's good yeah, you always win, even if it hurts.


  • Music Lovers

    @pe7erpark3r said in How do you figure out whom to trust?:

    Are you sure about that? Do you believe that the people who wouldn't deceive you in the real world, will deceive you in the virtual world? Do you think the fact of a (relative) anonymity brings out the worst in people, that you wouldn't see IRL?

    Anonymity, is a double edged sword, which doesnt necessarily bring out the worst of a person, but brings out their true selves. In this world, everyone is wearing a superficial mask of social acceptance in real life, You dont get to see their reality and true feelings because of that. But with anonymity, any social obligation is automatically lifted, so when you are anonymous, you are the most HUMAN. AND TRUST ME SPIDEY, HUMANS ARE FUCKED UP.



  • @pe7erpark3r said in How do you figure out whom to trust?:

    I think under "guiding" for me falls also marrying

    For me marrying and a relationship is the same, I don't need a cerimony nor sign some papers to prove I love someone (or I shouldn't). With that said, i'm nowhere near against marriage and i would love to marry one day, was just lightly bringing my opinion up to say that, even then, even in a marriage and a relationship, I don't think i'll have to be "guided", cuz it feels like i'm doing something wrong if I choose the path I see fitting. A relationship is like a team, you move towards the same goal, so you don't need guidance as you are walking holding hands. Something like that. For me to be in a serious relationship I would need that kind of trust already and that's the hard part. Trusting someone is not that hard, you just need to not close and doubt everything they say but fully/blindly trust them is much more intimate and deep!



  • @spaceboy said in How do you figure out whom to trust?:

    As I told many times here: "Every word can be a lie, every picture can be a fake". So it is better to be hidden under the mask. Anyway your thoughts are still reflects yourself, so it is still you under the mask. We can dig deeper to the question, who we are really.. Ehm.. The correct question would be, which mask is more real. That one, which you put on when you communicate with your family and friends in real life, or that one which you put on when you write here or on any other forum. But all of these masks are the part of you. You is you, do you trust to yourself?

    These thoughts reminds me a character of V.. (from V for Vendetta comics (and film))
    alt text
    The man, who lost his memory and under the mask implement a character of vengeance. It relates to question, who are we. Ourselfs as ourselfs, or our deeds make ourselfs.. You can forgot about whom you are, and become someone else.. But looks like it is the theme for another topic 🙂

    Returning to the question of trust. Sometimes you don't thins about circumstances, and allows to someone to look at the face which is hidden under the mask. "There is a face under the mask, but it isn't me" - as said a character, that I mentioned above. Everyone put on a mask, and everyone rise his own edges of trust with others..

    The great genius Karl Jung had an interesting take on this. He called those masks personas (from the ancient greek theater) and taught that people were able to fuse with their personas. Interestingly enough, if that happened, one and the same person would have completely different characteristics in different circumstances. They would be an entire different character at home with their wife and children, than in the workplace.

    He also taught, that if you are able to integrate all that is in you (male and female, animal and man) you would become whole (the self would emerge, as he called it). An integrated man (or woman) is one whom you can recognize as the same person in different circumstances. Someone who no longer just presents masks to people but actually shows them who he or she is.

    That of course is a very shallow description of youngs personality theory, but it shines an interesting light on the subject don't you think?




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