I hate myself - 11 ways you can kick the evil of self-hate away


  • I hate myself - a thought that keeps circling in your mind, eating away at your sanity every chance it gets. It’s like an abyss that only drags you further down, deeper into the doldrums. Is it right, though? This voice that insistently speaks against you? It definitely is not.

    You see, self hate does no good. It only drains your health and your confidence. It sucks the life out of your personality, leaving it black and white. If you let it feast on you, it can attack your mental health, spread its branches and give birth to concerns like stress, anxiety, and depression.

    Rather than asking yourself questions like “why do I hate myself?” change them to “how do I love myself?” Don’t water negative self-talk and let it nurture. Instead, focus on how to start loving yourself.

    Wondering how to do that? Here are 11 ways you can let go of self-hatred and the evils it brings along.

    woman holding yellow and black balloon

    1. Be kind to yourself

    We’re all told about how we need to learn to be more empathetic, and kinder to others. However, we forget to use the same approach for ourselves. Since charity begins at home, you should start practicing kindness and empathy on yourself first. Let yourself breathe, take a break, and know it is okay to make mistakes.

    Stop constantly mocking, berating and looking at yourself with judgmental eyes. Every time you scratch an old wound, every time you scold yourself, you let yourself down. On the other hand, when you learn to be kind to yourself, you forgive yourself, you understand that to err is human.

    2. Figure out your pain points

    Solve yourself like a question. Try to figure out what causes your self-esteem to dip so low so as to indulge in feelings of self hate. Are bad memories triggering the negative feelings? Once you are able to identify the exact cause behind your dislike for yourself, you can work on overcoming it.

    For instance, if you feel you are not competitive enough, you can work on improving yourself. If you keep thinking about an ex and have thoughts like I hate myself for loving you, let yourself feel along with moving on. If you hate yourself because of rejection, learn to not dwell on it. Find out where the evil lies to be able to nip it in the bud.

    3. Be grateful

    The moment you stop comparing yourself to other people, you will find a huge weight lifted off your chest. Several people skin their own self-esteem by feeling that they don’t have as much as others do. You will find yourself in a cycle of reciting I hate my life if you don’t stop comparing and start being grateful.

    Here’s the deal - you have several things that others don’t. You need to focus on what you have. And if you have made social media stalking and the resultant self-hatred into a habit, you need to break free. Almost everything on social media is a partial lie anyway, coated in a layer of glittering glamor.

    4. Bring your confidence out

    Do things that make you feel better. For instance, if you enjoy singing, practice more often. Let music pull you out from the hole of self hate. If you once were passionate about art, work harder on it. Perhaps it can restore your faith in yourself and your confidence.

    Do what you enjoy doing. Make new friends who encourage you. You can also make online pen pals. Consider traveling. It’s well known that traveling can be a mood and confidence booster. If you have no special talents or interests to invest in, create some. That would be better than searching for I hate my life quotes online and feeding the darkness within.

    5. Distance yourself from toxic people

    Perhaps the reason behind the I hate myself thoughts circulating in your mind is a feeling being pushed by someone in your circle. Do you have a toxic friend, family member, colleague or partner who is perhaps bullying you?

    Someone who is playing with the strings of your emotions without you even being aware? If you just nodded to these questions, it is time to eliminate this certain someone from your life. Surround yourself with folks who care for you genuinely, not who are toxic influences who demean you or are slowly killing your self-esteem.

    6. Join a support group

    Know that you are not the solo rider of this phase of self hate. You are not alone in having thoughts like I hate myself or I hate my life. You are not the only person who harbors questions about his existence, wondering all the time why do I hate myself so much?

    Many other people also struggle with self-loathing. Talking to people who have been through this issue in the past and overcame it can help. In this regard, you can join a community of supporters. You can also share your burden with a stranger who will not judge you. The best part of this option is that you can also keep your identity anonymous!

    7. Don’t ignore self-care

    Learn to love yourself. You can start at this by practicing self-care. If you’re thinking about the how part, know that you can start by eating well. Do not indulge in emotional overeating as it comes with dozens of health woes. Nourish yourself with a healthy diet.

    Perhaps your blue mood is because of messed up gut health. If you suspect that to be the case, consider taking probiotics. Other ways you can practice self-care include visiting a spa, taking a day off, and sleeping well. Moreover, you can also declutter by getting rid of unwanted things and cleaning your surroundings. Science says decluttering helps destress.

    8. Consider yoga and meditation

    Yoga and meditation can help clear your mind, organize your thoughts and induce peace. These two can also improve your memory and concentration. They are connected to your emotions as well and can work to fight off mood-swings. How do I love myself, you ask? Practice yoga and meditation. Easy-peasy.

    They can balance your lifestyle, and if you struggle with insomnia, they can also fight it off. What’s more, yoga and meditation can also reduce anxiety and depression by relaxing the mind. In fact, these two also provide a bunch of other health benefits.

    9. Practice mindfulness

    Mindfulness refers to living in the present, not dwelling on the past or thinking about the future. Often dislike for oneself and the I hate myself thought process is initiated by past trauma. Practicing mindfulness and appreciating each moment for what it is can help.

    This means being in the moment without being judgmental. Being aware of your surroundings and giving your mind the space to wander. Mindfulness helps reduce stress, anxiety, depression, and insomnia. Apart from mental benefits, it also holds advantages for your physical and emotional well-being.

    10. Don’t isolate yourself

    Several people resort to isolating themselves socially when self hate becomes a part of their life. That is because they think that they don’t belong anywhere. This social isolation only worsens the issue as they find themselves lonely and friendless.

    A better idea? Socialize. Challenge yourself. Learn how to make new friends. You can also express your interest to that crush of yours. However, be wise when it comes to picking the people you choose to befriend or hang out with.

    11. Get help

    If you find your negative feelings about your self-worth spiraling out of control, it is best to seek help. You should connect with a professional. A mental health practitioner can help you navigate the territory of self-acceptance while taking you out of the self hate realm.

    If your situation is not as bad and all you need is a friend, someone to talk to, you can meet people online. Moreover, you can discuss your feelings with someone you can trust in person as well. Such as a close friend, a parent or a sibling. However, steer clear of anyone who can use your feelings against you and just aggravate the problem.

    Key takeaway

    Thoughts that scream I hate myself or I hate my life should not be fed. Instead, you should do your best to walk away from the voices that create echoes of self hate. Letting yourself sink into the feelings of self-loathing can scar your mental, emotional, and physical health.

    It’s as bad as being obsessed with yourself, and we all know how out of hand that can get. The thing is, it is necessary to live with moderation. While self-reflection is good, berating yourself over the smallest of mistakes you make is harmful. Learn self-acceptance by loving yourself. If you find your condition getting out of hand, connect with a professional and go for therapy.

    If you just want to talk to someone, know that you can always talk with a stranger via our app.


  • @am said in I hate myself - 11 ways you can kick the evil of self-hate away:

    I hate myself - a thought that keeps circling in your mind, eating away at your sanity every chance it gets. It’s like an abyss that only drags you further down, deeper into the doldrums. Is it right, though? This voice that insistently speaks against you? It definitely is not.

    You see, self hate does no good. It only drains your health and your confidence. It sucks the life out of your personality, leaving it black and white. If you let it feast on you, it can attack your mental health, spread its branches and give birth to concerns like stress, anxiety, and depression.

    Rather than asking yourself questions like “why do I hate myself?” change them to “how do I love myself?” Don’t water negative self-talk and let it nurture. Instead, focus on how to start loving yourself.

    Wondering how to do that? Here are 11 ways you can let go of self-hatred and the evils it brings along.

    woman holding yellow and black balloon

    1. Be kind to yourself

    This is a good place to start, if you hate yourself tho, it's not an easy task to change your mindset. It CAN however be done

    3. Be grateful

    I found that being grateful is a good thing to do. For things like the friends you have, the family and other small day to day things.... Start small and work bigger

    4. Bring your confidence out

    There are many ways you can achieve this. Getting new interests is a good place to start, maybe join local community groups which can help to develop new friends and social circles

    5. Distance yourself from toxic people

    Often a very difficult thing to do. Again can be achieved by new activities and social groups

    7. Don’t ignore self-care

    This is always important. Since good health and hygiene help to a healthy mind

    8. Consider yoga and meditation

    Yoga is great for the Mind, the Body and the Soul..... If you go to a Yoga group then there is yet another chance of a new social circle with some like minded people

    10. Don’t isolate yourself

    Isolation leads to depression, this then can have a detrimental affect on you wellbeing

    11. Get help

    This is important, since this life, its very hard to cope with it on your own.... Being proud and not feeling that you need to seek help is a very tall order to achieve, but if you do the old saying of ..."A Problem Shared is a Problem Halved"

    If you just want to talk to someone, know that you can always talk with a stranger via our app.

    This is a really interesting topic, I have added some of the ideas that have helped me over the years.

    Thanks @am

  • Freedom Writers

    @am
    To all people who got stuck in such a deadlock,

    Ask yourself what kind of person you'd admire, and set such a personality as a goal or a path to follow in life. Try to change yourself bit by bit, every day. If you want to see change, act towards it. Now. You are in full possession of your awesome body nature has gifted you. I always say this to a lot of people~ Life is like a ticket to an awesome movie, if you wanna watch it, go ahead. If you feel like you have no use with it, just give it to someone else you feel is worthy of your "ticket"- your time, your energy, attention, love, your everything. Don't waste it! :))

    With love,
    Pr~ <3